Wednesday, August 31, 2022

TAKE THE LEAP ! PURPOSE LAB

Sonia Di Maulo called this course Take the Leap. Why? It came from a book she wrote, The Apple in the Orchard. It was endorsed by Ken Blanchard, who wrote:

"Opportunities for growth and learning are all around you - so take the leap, and grow!"

1. Cultivate your decision-making/guiding principles. 

GOAL: Ground ourselves in purpose and prosperity.

A tree with strong roots laughs at storms. Malay Proverb

2. Discover and embrace your superpowers.

We have all Via character strengths. 

They are from 6 virtues:
WISDOM - creativity, curiosity, judgement, love of learning, perspective
COURAGE - bravery, perserverance, honesty, zest
HUMANITY - love, kindness, social intelligence
JUSTICE - teamwork, fairness, leadership
TEMPERANCE - forgiveness, humility, prudence, self-regulation
TRANSENDANCE - appreciation of beauty/excellence, hope, gratitude, humour, spirituality

My top 5 are:
Fairness
Appreciation of Beauty/Excellence
Honesty
Kindness
Love of Learning

3. Explore your Ikigai (Passions and Purpose)

It's a guide, like a North Star, and incredible things start to fall into place. You naturally reframe your focus and energy; doors begin to open you didn't even know existed.  

It supports our one undeniable calling...to be ourselves. 

Your ikigai/purpose, once clear, become core to your essence, your being and your doing.

Understanding the ikigai helps us say yes to the right things and no to the wrong things.

David E. Marlow The Ikigai Guy (LinkedIn)

The visual of ikigai is a beautiful example of a Venn diagram. 
What do you love? What are you good at? What can you get paid for? What the world needs?
What is your passion (energy)? What is your mission (aim)? What is your profession (career)? What is your vocation (calling)?
Your ikigai is in the middle, connecting all these things.

"But there is no reliable shortcut to action. In fact, we may come to recognize that the conversation is the action. Growing in wisdom and compassion is the work. Every thing else is just testing stuff out."

Michelle Holliday

Leap from the comfortable to the uncomfortable.

4. Celebrate your Past and Present, and Ground your Future (Growth Model)

"It doesn't matter how slow you go, as long as you don't stop." Confucius

"Each person leaves a legacy -- a single, small piece of themselves, which makes richer each individual life and the collective life of humanity as a whole. " - John Nichols

Tell and share! Living fully every day! Take time to experience ourselves. What makes us happy? What brings us joy?

We are a constant ripple effect.

5. Breathe life in to your living legacy.

You don't become a legend by living in your comfort zone. Start writing your story.

Three parts:

- How you experience yourself, every minute, every hour, every day. 

- How people experience you every minute, every hour, every day. (Does it align with your guiding principles? Are you using your strengths in presenting your authentic self?)

- The benefits you are leaving for yourself and others when you are not there.

Don't worry if your first thought s not your best thought. Write them down anyways!

Yearly living legacy is a compass. It give you a heading. Write something, not necessarily that you think you can achieve, but inspires you, scares you, engages you.

Look for a focus point, not necessarily an end point. 

e.g.  Sonia's yearly legacy

2019 To help 100 people discover, create, embrace, and breathe life into their living legacies.

2020 To help 1000 people discover, create, embrace, and breathe life into their living legacies.

2021 Active 100,000 emerging leaders to discover, create, embrace and breath life into their living legacies by 2025.

Workbook: 

Specific

Measurable

Achievable

Relevant

Time-bound

SMART 1 year living legacy

WRITE THE LIVING LEGACY YOU HAVE IN MIND (5 minutes)

I would like to eliminate the physical clutter around me, and make room and time to evaluate my guiding principles, powers, passions and purpose. I would like to have a house that has a place for everything, and space for another. I would like to have the readiness to spend available time with my daughter and friends, because I have an orderly life with some advance preparations. I would like to continue to have guarded precious time alone with myself, to ski, and hike, and read, and write, and dream. I would like to invest my money wisely in preparation of leaving my job in 5 years, and prepare my resume and 5 year plan to my next phase of life. I want to have my affairs in order so that my death would be planned to minimized the impact on my family when the time comes. I would like to continue to find a common ground with my daughter so that when I am gone, she has a living legacy to admire and follow, as she chooses.

Where do I want to end up on January 31, 2023? 

I will organize each room to have its own items with room to spare in the storage areas I already have (so no room to expand, only to contract) and only have 2 boxes of "craft project items" stored, with the rest recycled or given away or garbaged if need be. I would like to start reorganizing my garden with priority to prepare for next year's growing season, repair the shed and deck, and install a railing for my neighbour. I am enrolled and will participate in a mentorship year. I will update my CV and be ready to submit it to a I will finish my daughter's baby book and the year she was 15, and prepare for the year she was 16). 

Draw your map (vision board?)

Use your own language! "Certified Reinvention Practitioner" "Soul Doctor"

What is my dream? 

Financial freedom

Time to reflect

Healthy balanced life

Advocacy for others for the same

Who do I want to be?

Enough for myself

In community with others

Connected mother

Ready friend

 What do I need to do for myself?

Less stuff

More efficiency

Better habits

 What are my tools? 

Knowledge

Supportive friends

Some financial security

How can I monetize my skills?

Not sure

What is my attitude? 

Hopeful

Tends to the dark ( I blame melancholy but acknowledge it)

Tends to resist (I blame introversion but accept it)

What is my perspective? What are my convictions?

Who are my top five people? Who knows me, and supports me? Who are my "mastermind" group?

Adle, Cindy, Nathan, Holly, Aviva

First Published January 31st 2022

Finally finished August 31st 2022!

Monday, August 29, 2022

THE POWER OF HABIT BY CHARLES DUHIGG

 WHY WE DO WHAT WE DO IN LIFE AND BUSINESS

I read the book, The Power of Habit,  first by listening. I had borrowed the audiobook and there was too much richness in it to leave it there. So I borrowed the real thing, at first just to fill in the visuals that were missing, but as I started to reread, and place sticky markers, I realized I needed to process it a little more.

This year, the library has decided to join with others to do away with late fees. I think it will be mistake. I have never liked to owe the fees, but they were not painful in amount, and apparently they were more essential to my good behaviour than I thought. So I am one month overdue, which has never happened in my adult life before, and I am pretending like I have another month because those are the limits. Meanwhile, I received several email reminders and a personal phone call from Brigitte (which thankfully went to voicemail so that I didn’t have to explain myself), and today I have to end this cycle!

It is apropos, then, that this book is about new habits. The one reality the library has in its favour is that I suspect I cannot win a gift certificate for a local bookstore in the Summer Reads Bingo if I don’t give it back by tomorrow, so here are few thoughts I want to carry with me.

This is book of stories, and the skill of storyteller is evident. I had heard a few of these stories before. How the military stopped riot violence in Iraq by studying the pattern, and doing away with food vendors, basically dispersing an angry crowd before it moved to violence. How unfortunate brain accidents led to our understanding of how the brain was organized, identifying the basal ganglia as essential to habit, with anterograde memory is destroyed. How Michael Phelps swam to an Olympic record essentially blind when his goggles leaked. How Rosa Parks inspired the Montgomery bus boycott that was a turning point in the civil rights movement.

It explains the success of the Saddleback Church, how the law handles addiction, the success of Starbucks, online marketing algorithms, and a number of cautionary tales that vary from London Underground fires to inexcusable medical errors like amputating the wrong limb. It gives concrete steps to changing habits that could benefit us all.

This is the executive summary, kindly reviewed in the Appendix:

Habits can be changed, if we understand how they work.

Cues and rewards are not enough. Only when you start craving the reward will the routine be automatic.

At the core of every habit exists a loop consisting of three parts: a cue, a routine, and a reward. 

With every bad habit, you want to replace the routine with a better one. Simply put:

1. Identify the routine.

2. Experiment with rewards.

3. Isolate the cue.

4. Have a plan

We use our basal ganglia to maintain routines, so that we save our mental energy for more conscious tasks.  

We share this organ with fish, reptiles, and other mammals. It is central to recalling patterns and acting on them. It stores habits as an automatic routine called « chunking », which gets more efficient over time, and conserves mental energy for other tasks. Once our brain recognizes a cue, it triggers automatic mode and which habit to use. The more rewards for a particular behaviour, the more automatic that routine becomes.

When a habit emerges, the brain stops decision making and follows the efficient routine. Bad habits are efficient, but they can be replaced with equally efficient good habits 

We need to find our autopilots and change our behaviour from the unconscious cues that we make conscious for a time.

Experiments show that almost all habitual cues fit into one of the five categories:

Location (Where are you?)

Time (What time is it?)

Emotional State (How do you feel?)

Other people (Who else is around?)

Immediately preceding action (What action preceded the urge)

IN SUMMARY:

Our brain likes automatic behaviour. Bad habits can be changed to good habits by changing the habit loop. Make a new cue. Create a craving for something better. Reward the good behaviour. This is how transformation occurs.

Address an old habit by keeping the same cues and rewards and feed the craving by inserting a new routine.

AA 90 meetings in 90 days is arbitrary and Bill W was agnostic and hostile to religion for part of his life. However, AA works because it identifies the cues/triggers (AWARENESS TRAINING) with a « searching and fearless inventory of ourselves (consider Proust’s questionnaire) » and admitting them to others. Ulf Mueller showed that turning off neurological cravings was not enough to stop drinking habits. Alternate routines were necessary for dealing with stress. This is called a competing response. AA also practices faith, because to change a habit, you have to believe that it’s possible. A community helps change because you believe it others. Commitment to others and accountability helps. 

Planning for failure, and recognizing negative ideas helps.

The power of changing a keystone habit is that that it can create a chain reaction. 

Stories to read and tell:

How a major near Kufa, Iraq kept the peace by teaching habits to soldiers and studying past riots with a simple solution to prevent new ones.

How Henry Molaison (H. M) taught scientists and doctors at MIT how critical the hippocampus was to memory when he lost his in a neurosurgical operation in 1953 following his head injury intended to improve his life to stop him from multiple daily recurrent grand mal seizures

How Eugene Pauly (E. P.) taught researchers in San Diego about the subconscious brain after he suffered from memory loss following viral encephalitis

How Claude Hopkins sold toothpaste so successfully that he created our tooth brushing habit by harnessing a craving for clean teeth

How Procter and Gamble turned Febreze into a success by understanding that bad smells aren’t cues but a clean house is a reward

How coach Tony Dungy took the worst team in the NFL by creating new habits with players established on-field cues (The Golden Rule of Habit Change: Insert a new routine) or how The Bucs won the Super Bowl in 2002 (even if he wasn’t there)

How Bill Wilson fought alcohol addiction with a 12 step program (friends of Bill W) that attacks the habits at the core 

How Paul O’Neill (who later became Treasury Secretary) remade an aluminum manufacturers by focussing on one « Keystone habit « 

How Charles Schulz went from high school dropout to Starbucks top manager by using habit to strengthen willpower

How Martin Luther King Jr. and the civil rights movement changed the social habits of Montgomery, AL

How Rick Warren built the nation’s largest church in the US (while being an introvert!)

How ethics and law see addiction and sociopathy in the context of crime

Sunday, August 28, 2022

STORYTELLING

 Of all the things I have the hardest time getting rid of from my daughter’s childhood, it’s the books. It’s not like they are in great shape, or that they have any monetary value. In fact, it’s so easy to get cheap books, and our library public sale gets cheaper every year.

It’s the stories that I want her to read. The magic of Sherazade’s tales as told by Disney. The rhythmic rhyme of the original Winnie-the-Pooh, so often dumbed down in the modern early readers. The heroic tales of kids stranded on an island who save themselves, or the inspiring women who did amazing things when the odds were stacked against them. 

Thomas King is my new favourite storyteller, and his 2003 CBC Massey Lectures, published as The Truth About Stories feeds an innate obsession with a human need for stories and storytelling. He says « The truth about stories is that that’s all we are. » He quotes Anishinabe writer Gerald Vizenor « You can’t understand the world without telling a story. There isn’t any center to the world but a story. »

The human brain seems to be set up for stories. I know that I have often wished for a brain that retains every word and fact perfectly, but what I do remember are the stories. I seek out podcasts by great storytellers, like Tim Hartford, Michael Lewis, Roman Mars, and Malcolm Gladwell. My daughter, who doesn’t read books as often as I did (we had fewer choices back in those days), gets some her stories from YouTube. She gravitates to the moralistic Dharma series, which is a little too neat for my liking, but I understand the draw for her, and it certainly has relevant talking points to discuss over the dinner table.

This summer, travelling in a van to visit friends and play tourist with my family in Saskatchewan , my parents were full of family stories, triggered by locations they knew people from, or memories that had been made away from home. My neighbour often tells me stories of her like, beginning with a laugh and the opener , « Oh, I haven’t told you that one ? » before she takes a breath and begins the story with delight. 

I love stories, and I respect a great one, but I respect even more that skill that a storyteller can have for telling it well.

Sometimes, I think I am a decent reporter of events, but I have never felt compelling in the art of storytelling. Thomas King is providing some clues in his book to his success, and P.D. James similarly breaks down the formula of the murder mystery in Talking about Detective Fiction (which is better than the very prosaic title suggests).

Each chapter/instalment/story begins with the same way, with a paragraph that repeats. It’s a great paragraph, and it’s a device that works. 

« There is a story I know. It’s about the earth and how it floats in space on the back of a turtle. I’ve heard this story many times, and each time someone tells the story, it changes. Sometimes the change is simply in the voice of the storyteller. Sometimes the change is in the details. Sometimes in the order of events. Other times it’s the dialogue or the response of the audience. But in all the telling of all the tellers, the world never leaves the turtle’s back. And the turtle never swims away. »

At the end of each chapter, he repeats the same four sentences, with a predictable change in a fifth. It is a benediction, an admonition, a challenge.

« Take [sic:this] story. It’s yours…Do with it what you will…But don’t say in the years to come that you would have lived your life differently if only you had heard this story. You’ve heard it now. »

He also says, « You’ll never believe what happened » is » always a good way to start a story ».

He describes his brother telling a story, « drawing out the details, repeating the good parts, making me wait ». 

He continues, « One of the tricks to storytelling is, never to tell everything at once, to make your audience wait, to keep everyone in suspense. »

Again, he contrasts, « Stories are wondrous things. And they are dangerous. »

Then he goes on to tell another creation story he calls Woman Who Fell From the Sky, and outlines the differences between it and the one I know so well from Genesis, and it’s interpretation from my « predominantly scientific, capitalistic, Judeo-Christian world governed by physical laws, economic imperatives, and spiritual precepts ».

In telling it, he takes a story and makes it sound dangerous, and then modifies it to be closer to the truth, but I enjoy the downgrade, because it’s fun. I enjoy the story, not because the story is so extraordinary, but the storytelling is. 

He interrupts his story to make a sarcastic commentary, in case I missed the obvious. But I am laughing, so I don’t feel he is dumbing it down for me, just that he want me to hear the point. 

My daughter would love this story, and I would love to tell it to her, but it won’t be the same. So I have to return the book to the library, and she may never read it, but I have to believe that the story I loved is now a part of me. That somehow, some part of the story will make it to her from me. So that she can see the magic in a story. So that she can see the danger in the story. So that she laugh at the story, and laugh at herself. 

Each chapter begins with the same paragraph. It’s a great paragraph, and it’s a device that works. 

« There is a story I know. It’s about the earth and how it floats in space on the back of a turtle. I’ve heard this story many times, and each time someone tells the story, it changes. Sometimes the change is simply in the voice of the storyteller. Sometimes the change is in the details. Sometimes in the order of events. Other times it’s the dialogue or the response of the audience. But in all the telling of all the tellers, the world never leaves the turtle’s back. And the turtle never swims away. »

At the end of each chapter, he repeats the same four sentences, with a predictable change in a fifth. It is a benediction, an admonition, a challenge.

« Take [sic:this] story. It’s yours…Do with it what you will…But don’t say in the years to come that you would have lived your life differently if only you had heard this story. You’ve heard it now. »

A great idea bears repeating. 

It’s what works for me. The story isn’t about an omniscient omnipresent potent creator god. It’s a series of blunders that we are capable of woven together as a warning and a truth. We come from complicated stories. We are complicated stories. That’s okay. In fact, it might just be the way things are. There is no fall from grace. No stain on humanity. There is acceptance, humour, pain, and grace.

The birth of a twins reflects the way I have been taught to believe to be an Asian look on life: zen, balance, yin and yang. There is a boy, light, right handed. There is a girl, dark, left handed. The right-handed twin smoothed mud into flat land. The left-handed twin stomped and piled the valleys and mountains. The right-handed twin fills strait trenches with water and organizes rivers to flow in both directions. The left-handed twin makes the rivers crooked, fills them with rocks, and lets them flow only in one direction, with waterfalls. The right-handed twin creates forest with trees all lined up, so you could go in and not get lost. The left-handed twin moves the trees around, so that some parts are dense and difficult and other parts open and easy. The right makes roses. The left makes thorns. The right makes summer. The left makes winter. The right, sunshine. The left, shadows. The right creates women, and the left creates men. (Until then, the story did not suit my feminist sensitivity to misogynistic norms, but the last move seems to even the playing field). The conclusion from telling to two stories in contrast leads back to his own personal stories as child. Although we love dichotomies, and « trust easy oppositions…we are suspicious of complexities, distrustful of contradictions, fearful of enigmas. ». It is clear, though, that these enigmas are everywhere. Maybe in them are more authentic stories than the ones we like to tell. 

Maybe at the base of our consciousness, we are all simplifying life to understand it, but a great story teller needs to do better than just making contrasts. As Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie explains in her TED talk The Danger of a Single Story , « The consequence of the single story is this: It robs people of dignity. It makes our equal humanity difficult. It emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are similar ».

Very often, I end a work day buoyed up by the stories that I have heard, even when the rest of the job has taken almost all my energy. I consider myself a decent listener, and a better interviewer, but if I think about the stories I have heard, they are more powerful than most of the people telling them. Once in a while, though, I met a storyteller that could take any ordinary story and turn it into magic. That’s rare, and when it happens, I always wish I didn’t have a job that spurs me on to the next important task, because if I could, I would sit there the rest of the day and listen to them tell me more stories.

My goal is the achieve the grand strokes of telling a decent story that compels beyond the basics, without the crutch of a murder mystery (which I find abhorrent unlike many), but my dream would be to tell a story like the story tellers all around us; in every good book.

A great idea bears repeating. And a good story lives on. It changes you. It displaces a part of you. It transforms you. It creates a new you. Tell your stories to those you love. Write them down. Collect them. Share them. They are, after all, who we are

Wednesday, July 27, 2022

THANK GOODNESS FOR TIME, OR EVERYTHING WOULD HAPPEN AT ONCE

My teacher friend and occasional life coach taught me the strategy of goal setting to do 15%. There is no stopping you from doing more, but the idea is to overcome analysis paralysis and set a smaller achievable goal instead of the long list that a lot of us work from daily.

The proportion of life to writing feels similar, so, in both cases, it seems like it’s never enough. If I could work 1 day and write the rest, or have 1 social event and then the next 6 days off, my life balance would be perfect! As it stands, running 1 day in 7 leads to unnecessary stiffness and muscle pain, and should clearly be more regularly. But most of us can’t get away with those proportion, and have to deal with the inverse reality, with a lot less time to process and ponder and reminisce and write about the things that are meaningful to us in a day. 

So as I go to bed late, I feel led to frenetically list the things that I have heard and thought about and enjoyed and do not (but most certainly will) forget. I have only met one person that I am certain had an eidetic  memory, and I am still jealous. If I remembered it all, I don’t think I would feel so compelled to write it down. I feel like Alexander Hamilton, but do it less. He wrote a lot, but I suspect that even he didn’t feel like he could write it all down. I hear the songs in my head on and off all day, and things like “I imagine death so much it feels like a memory” resonate with me. 

The title is a paraphrase from Einstein. This much I understand about relativity!

I listen to a podcast funnelled to a Pushkin channel I adore called Cautionary Tales. The episode was about a volcano called Mount Tambour in Indonesia with such terrible losses that it sounds like the Apocalypse. The weather in Europe is terrible and the season in Switzerland where a group of storytellers get together and change gothic literature forever is called the “year with summer”. Without it, the idea of Frankenstein’s monster and Vampires would never have happened. In Canada in 1816, a similar effect was felt. Reading about the eruption led to Pompeii, and another volcano eruption that was more well known, but still pretty obscure, from  1883.  Yes, I just discovered that George’s lies about raising money for the brave Krakatoans was based on a real disaster, just not at all in context.

I learned that the Louisiana Purchase from the Spanish (ignoring the nations that already lived there) actually included portions in southern Alberta and Saskatchewan!

I feel grateful, in a pool full of young swimmers, that my daughter is such a good one. She can’t remember how to breath without using snorkel goggles all fogged up and hasn’t swum like a human for years, but she is a graceful fish, who spend the afternoon trying to perfect her splash, while and watched and barely recalled the years of worry when she couldn’t be trusted even with a bubble on her back to pitch headfirst and try to drown. 

I wondered at words recorded in the genealogy searches of celebs how a person actually died of “asthenia”, a word that google struggled to believe exists.

I watched a new series of the British Bake-Off and heard the German baked called a “Konditormeister” in praise of winning the honour of the week.

I read about the British “Home Children” experiences and recognized familiar abuse and unreasonable expectations of a group that had no one defending them. 

I read about the architecture of a house, now a real estate agency in Burlington that looked, with the rolling lawn in front, like the back of the White House, with its neoGrecian columns and familiar lamp.

I even refound a website called Alloprof with how to write an argumentative essay, in French,  and many others, with explanations of what is required. 

Meanwhile, our friends travel around the Gaspésie without ever really knowing where we went, but finding their own adventure. 

Even in Covid times, we don’t have enough time for ourselves, or others. The only way I had time to write these few words was to go to sleep way past my bedtime.

Monday, July 25, 2022

PRIVACY AND POSSESSION

It was a busy weekend, filled with pleasures. A trip to Ottawa with my favourite daughter, to visit a favourite friend and her family, and absorb the wonder of a live performance of Hamilton. A trip to the border, with empty trunk and nervous battery saving for the return required arriveapp with a friend who is good company and needed a ride for her first visit to see her dad and stepmom since the pandemic descended. A walk and supper by the Lake Champlain, with a view of a Juniper Island crowded with evergreens and a layered backdrop of the Adirondack mountains with a warm summer breeze.

 I went to be tired, with windows open and fan blowing to bring in the fresh cooler air that the rainstorm had afforded. I woke up in a  shirt and underwear, and no alarm. When I went to the kitchen to get breakfast, and looked out the living room window while petting Calico, I realized that I felt freer than usual. My neighbour to the direction of both of those rooms’ window, and to the back are not home. One is  recovering from illness in the hospital, and unlikely to return given the state of dementia he was living with. The other is on holiday in Europe for a couple of weeks. 

Normally, I am not aware of an restrictions in my house. I feel fortunate (even uncomfortable in being spoiled) with the amount of space and freedom living in the suburbs in a luxurious detached house with some generous yard space surrounding it. But today I see that I feel boxed on equally, and that I would prefer additional private space outside my walls to truly feel the freedom I ideally crave.

My friend in Ottawa had bought a brand new car to replace the old one that was without air conditioner and leaking coolant. She commutes a significant distance for work, and was enjoying the safety and convenience of her new reliable car until the Monday previous, when it was stolen from her drive way. Even worse, she had managed to acquire the car in her preferred red, which was hard to come by in this market, and even harder to replace at this moment. Additionally, she had spend an hour on the phone answering innumerable questions about insurance, only to find out that the replacement cost had not been discussed, and she was not covered as she had reasonable expected for a new car.

What we have, and how we feel we own it, is both a pleasure and a burden. The necessity of something is most easily debated when we do without, or are gifted something unexpectedly. Communal ownership or a detachment from our possessions is critical to our satisfaction. Living simply with few needs, but with enough to answer then, is a tightrope to be walked with care. It is a scale to be balanced. It is a constant tasting, like the three bears, to find the temperate that is “just right”, knowing that it will not last long, and we will have to keep on testing. 

Things fall apart, break down, go away. People and relationships do too. The Newtonian rules of the universe taught me this in high school, but the reality of Einstein’s relativity would come later. The energy is never lost, and it can be used to rebuild, repair, renew in a different form. Life and ownership, friendships, needs and wants, are constantly changing. Our happiness can not depend on any particular form of it, but it is a nice thing to enjoy what we really love while we have it, as long as we are not dependent on it and dissatisfied when we lose it.

Tuesday, June 28, 2022

BOOK REVIEW: INDIANS ON VACATION

Bird and Mimi are a comfortably retired pair of artists that are retracing the route of his Uncle Leroy, following his postcards from his forced travels across Europe in a circus where he featured as “the Indian”. The story is set in Prague, but travels much more widely. The narrator is Bird, a curmudgeon philosopher, accompanied by his wife Mimi, an enthusiastic planner. The story contains typical travel adventures from illness to theft, but also intersects with the Syrian refugee crisis in the Budapest train station, and is filled with a lifetime of comedic truisms.


For a journalist, Bird doesn’t seem to involve himself very much in the present. In spite of this, the book manages to supersede the expectations of the usual travelogue. Peppered with amusing dialogue between a couple long used to navigating their opposite view points, the story is accompanied by an entourage of the narrator’s imaginary friends and demons that are not always able to hide.  


From what I know of Thomas and his partner Helen from reading The Inconvenient Indian, I felt I was temporarily in their company, travelling through Europe and North America, past and present, with an entourage of invisible demons, lovingly named and accepted by his polar opposite and essential travel companion.


Thoughtful, heartwarming, and real, this couple’s easy and funny dialogue comes from long practice of patience, acceptance and love. This book is equal parts laughter and reality, which is good fit for winning the Stephen Leacock Memorial Medal of Humor Award.


Notable Quotes


Bird: “ I feel my blood sugars dropping. It’s not a pleasant sensation, akin to discovering you’re in the middle Saskatchewan in winter and out of gas.”


“I don’t believe in cosmic laws but I’ve come to accept that there is an inverse relationship between good restaurants and wherever we happen to be. The better the restaurant, the farther away we are from it.”


“Mimi has a theory that travel makes time stop, or at least slows it down. Her reasoning has a simple elegance. When you are home, you follow into routines. These routines are so familiar that you do them without even thinking or noticing the passage of time…When you are travelling, everything is new and every minute is taken up with decision making. Tic toc tic toc.”


Eugene and the other demons. “Lots of people have demons. I know I do, and my approach to dealing with them is to pretend that they don’t exist, to leave them tucked away in the darkness. Mimi doesn’t subscribe to my method and early on she decided that we should name them. Calle them out,as it were. To shine a light into the shadows. Eugene…is the main man, self-loathing…And you like to catastrophize. That’s Cat, or Kitty… and then we have the twins, Deedee and Desy, Depression and Despair.”


“Pizza is a young person’s dish. Grease doesn’t slow them down, molten cheese doesn’t plug them up, processed meat doesn’t clog their arteries. Immortal. You have to be immortal to eat pizza.”


“The default response is that we travel in order to see new places, to meet new people, to broaden our understanding of the world. Whereas I tend to see travel as punishment for those of us who can afford such a mistake.”


“The first expectation of a good travel story is that something went wrong. No one wants to hear about the uneventful time you spent in Istanbul, not even you. Next time, try harder.”


Mimi proposes a purpose to their travels: “Make our own bundle.” (of postcards)


“The Institute to Confound and Demoralize is something that Mimi has made up to deal with the contradictions that seem to arise with alarming frequency. “


On moving: “Having to start over again without the ignorance and enthusiasm of youth. Moves, in the abstract, might look to be wonderful adventures, but they’re really more akin to a life threatening disease or the death of a spouse. Most people recover but it takes at least two years to get back on your feet. Some of us have that kind of time. Some of us don’t.”


All the major contemporary events: Alcatraz 69 Trail of Broken Treaties 72 Wounded Knee 73 Seminals and Gaming 79 Oka 90 Ipperwash 95 Idle No More 2012 Elsipogtog fracking protest 2014 Dakota Access Pipeline Protest 2017. “If it had feathers and drums, I was there.”

Oz: Story of Russians coming to Prague. “This young man was angry that his country had been invaded and he picked up a piece of charcoal and found a wall. Here was his opportunity to write something that might stop the slaughter, something that might push back the tanks and chains what was to happen. But because his task seems so monumental, so impossible, he wrote nothing…(interrupted by the recall of the names of the 7 dwarves)…But your Uncle Leroy. Look what he was able to do with a bucket of shit and a brush. “

*Apologies for typos. I listened to the audiobook and estimated the spellings on occasions!

Thursday, June 16, 2022

WRITING FOR A FRIEND

A few years ago, I found a trio of intrepid characters, and they have lived in my mind ever since. Over the course of three years, mostly written in the two short months of November, I created a story. I liked the characters, and I like the story. 

Then I tried to get clever, and thought my story was a little shiftless. 

I owe several people a debt for inspiring me to this point, and the most intrepid has already read a very bad erotica that I wrote on vacation beside her in Cuba, and she still travelled with me again later! 

So I thought about where my story could go, because the plot seemed a bit lacking, and I gave her the following options: romance, mystery, or historical fiction. She picked mystery, and I expected her to pick romance, and I have been struggling ever since. 

(I am currently writing in a quiet darkened house with my daughter studying science for her final exam tomorrow and my sleeping cat in a box that she can just barely squeeze into but that she has claimed as her own. Outside the rolling thunder and winds have come and gone, and I have no power. 

I regret not boiling tea when I first thought of it, and I had just discovered that using the water in my house during a thunder storm has some risk, so the shower that I could use now is also off the table for options.)

It turns out that I have learned the trick to writing (don’t think about it, just write!), but I have a lot to learn. I am not yet flexible or imaginative enough to take an idea and bend it to my will, even if it is a good idea or a familiar one. I am also struggling to edit my work. It feels like I am a raccoon with cotton candy. I do what I am used to, and before I know it, the act of rewriting words that I kind of liked the first time, but disappeared into nothing in my hands. Like the raccoon washing its food only to watch it dissolve, my editing results in no words that are worth keeping. It has been discouraging, and I am not able to get down to it as I was able to write. 

I even revisited the group that inspired me to write, but all the incentives and expectations are about writing and word counts. How do I inspire editing? By words, time, quality? Every time I diverge, I am dissatisfied. I write parallel stories, but they characters walk around aimlessly like an early version of SIM family. I can’t seem to give them purpose. It all seems so frustratingly pointless. I think like a reader, and I am certain that this is badly written and not even that great of an idea.

Authors are follow tend to be serialists, and most of those have been murder mystery. Agatha Christie chastises me from the grave. “I would just come up with an idea, and sometimes I would write the story in a weekend!” Argh!

So I lay down with a few ideas after a walk home one night. I thought about all the books I had read that worked for me: Nancy Drew, Hardy Boys, Trixie Beldon, Inspector Gamache, Kinsey Milhone, Hercule Poirot, Miss Marple,  Encyclopedia Brown, Commisario Brunetti, Jeanette Oke’s intrepid female pioneers.

Here are my thoughts today on The Mystery at Chateau Laurier

Don’t tell the story as it happens. The trick is to keep some of it to the end for a revelation.

There is isn’t enough room for all 3 characters. Stephanie is the protagonist. She could have a physical disability that is obvious, but relieved in the pool. She may not join her friends for this story. It is often necessary to be alone for some things to happen.

Don’t be afraid to be outrageous, romantic, dramatic. That’s fun to read!`

Set the treasure hunt from the memory the a child who had done the hunt, and now was creating it.

The front desk, the room with Kirsch’s photographs, a table with fake books, fireplace, swimming pool plants or fountain.

So for Sarah T, I am still thinking and plotting and reading and writing and editing and rewriting. One day, when I think it’s a completed thought and not too painful to read!

Friday, June 3, 2022

WELLNESS REFLECTION NUMBER TWO

 It’s not easy for me to do something weekly, and it’s even harder for me to do something daily. For the first time in a few months, I had a week off from shifts, and that’s not a coincidence that I managed to do something daily. It’s probably why I am doing this “weekly” task that I haven’t done for a few weeks!

Today I am proud to report that I have run 3K every day. It’s also worth saying that I didn’t plant my garden yet, and I am not sure that I am not overeating for the few calories extra that I am burning. But it was a little more fun, and I was a little less stiff today. It was tough getting through those first 5 runs, but a fun run with a friend who hadn’t run at all yesterday, and a brother who is running circles around me linked to me by technology on my wrist made it a little easier. Now I am back into shifts, so it’s going to be tougher to come home and do it after a long day, but I am pumped and excited not to break the chain.

In other thoughts, I am in a good place. I was using a food processor to make energy balls this week. It was a wedding present from a friend, now deceased, who had also bought me the only 4 red wine glasses I possess. I am down to one, but one is enough during Covid, and I was laughing when I realized that those two gifts from a friend were more use to me than anything my husband did in 13 years of marriage! 

I was also grateful for caution. One of our colleagues had just decided to retire. I was glad, because I could see that the department was getting to him, but he died on his first day of vacation, just a month shy of his last day at work. I went to the funeral, and was wearing a mask, because I didn’t want anyone to be uncomfortable. I managed not to shake hands, but I was offered more than one. Most people weren’t wearing masks, and in the emotion of it, I realized that I was not used to showing my face anymore, and was happy to hide behind it on this occasion. 

When the announcement came today that someone tested positive, I had no regrets. Well, maybe that I couldn’t call in sick tomorrow. But sick call is for sissies. I have only had to use it on three occasions in 22 years. Although I would have liked for someone to have my back when I lost my voice, and gone to my grandmas funerals. Such is the dark side of such a code of conduct. We are trying to make it more normal to call in sick, but we still have so little redundancy that it’s still very difficult. Being a unionized unit agent about to retire doesn’t protect you fully either. So take whatever is given to you (unless you are one of those people who know you don’t deserve your jobs’ perks), and, for most of us, find ways to build a life in between work, because no one has a guarantee that they will be given it after.

Saturday, May 28, 2022

WILL (SMITH)

Will may be a billionaire superstar, but if it wasn’t for his photo, I would still have to clarify, Will Smith?

As years go, this last one has been a rollar coaster. I imagine that many people remember the Oscars, and his misguided attempt to defend his wife’s honour with physical violence. I suspect the loss of a friend is the greatest of his many losses that night. After reading this book, I think the loss he feels most is the blow to his ego.

I am very sympathetic to the narcissist that celebrity must create. I suspect that any front man, with a longtime group of friends and the support of a life partner is at least grounded in many ways that keep traits from becoming a full-blown disorder. I can only imagine what a childhood full of violence can do to your psyche. Our parents have long lasting, negative, permanent effects on our personalities, even if they are not violent. “99% is zero %” is the more severe version of  “99%? What happened to the 1%?”, but they both expect the same: the impossible standard of perfection.

So it was with interest, and, with equal measure, skepticism, that I read this autobiography of Willard Smith the Second. I see that he has written other books, so maybe this is not his complete story. Still, it was the most complete picture I knew of him, and it was worth the read.

Will is about a remarkable life. It is a transformation that most of us would never dream possible. It is not a life that most of us would want, but it is a life that many do covet. 

If you look at the chapter names, you see that this is not just a ego-driven biopic of success. This is an extraordinary human’s search for meaning, and he makes it clear that the success and wealth he garnered did not make this easier than any ordinary human. That said, he is convincing as a self-reflective writer, at least at critical moments. I couldn’t say how much his co-author influences his writing, but having written raps and screenplays, it certainly has the ring of authenticity. He reads his own audiobook that has some great acting and music in it, so that sells it too!

I didn’t make many notes, but I did copy some quotes that were poignant. Some of them are quotes from others. I hope I reflect their wise words accurately. Pick up the book or listen to the audiobook, if you want to check it out.

It’s respectable to lose to the universe. It’s a tragedy to lose to yourself.


Be nice to everyone on the way up because you might meet them on the way down.

Don’t block your blessings.

Gammy


Everything Is impossible right up until it’s not. 

No paralysis by analysis. 

Master your instrument. Talent comes from God. You are born with it. Skill comes from sweat and practice and commitment. Hone your craft. 

Quincy Jones


Psychographic


Play the cards you have, not the ones that you wish you had. (but don’t )


Inattentive blindness 


Humans have two problems: we don’t know what what we want, or we know what we want, but don’t know how to get it. 

Steven Covey


The universe is not logical. It’s magical. A major aspect of the pain and mental anguish we experience as humans is that our minds seek, and, often demand, logic and order from an illogical universe. Our minds desperately want shit to add up. But the rules of logic do not apply to the laws of possibility. The universe functions under the laws of magic.


I’d rather see a sermon

I'd rather see a sermon than hear one any day;

I'd rather one should walk with me than merely tell the way.

The eye's a better pupil and more willing than the ear,

Fine counsel is confusing, but example's always clear;

And the best of all the preachers are the men who live their creeds,

For to see good put in action is what everybody needs.


I soon can learn to do it if you'll let me see it done;

I can watch your hands in action, but your tongue too fast may run.

And the lecture you deliver may be very wise and true,

But I'd rather get my lessons by observing what you do;

For I might misunderstand you and the high advise you give,

But there's no misunderstanding how you act and how you live.


When I see a deed of kindness, I am eager to be kind.

When a weaker brother stumbles and a strong man stays behind

Just to see if he can help him, then the wish grows strong in me

To become as big and thoughtful as I know that friend to be.

And all travelers can witness that the best of guides today

Is not the one who tells them, but the one who shows the way.


One good man teaches many, men believe what they behold;

One deed of kindness noticed is worth forty that are told.

Who stands with men of honor learns to hold his honor dear,

For right living speaks a language which to every one is clear.

Though an able speaker charms me with his eloquence, I say,

I'd rather see a sermon than to hear one, any day.


Edgar Guest


If you ain’t helping, you hurtin’

Darrel

Friday, May 27, 2022

BOOK REPORT: WILL

It’s respectable to lose to the universe. It’s a tragedy to lose to yourself

Be nice to everyone on the way up because you might meet them on the way down.

Don’t block your blessings 

Everything is impossible right up until it’s not. No paralysis by analysis. 

Master your instrument. Talent comes from God. You are born with it. Skill comes from sweat and practice and commitment. Hone your craft. 

--Quincy Jones

Psychographic

Play the cards you have, not the ones that you wish you had (but don’t )

Inattentive blindness 

Humans have two problems: we don’t know what what we want, or we know what we want, but don’t know how to get it. 

--Stephen Covey

“The universe is not logical. It’s magical. A major aspect of the pain and mental anguish we experience as humans is that our minds seek, and, often demand, logic and order from an illogical universe. Our minds desperately want shit to add up. But the rules of logic do not apply to the laws of possibility. The universe functions under the laws of magic.”

I'd Rather See A Sermon 
I'd rather see a sermon than hear one any day;
I'd rather one should walk with me than merely tell the way.
The eye's a better pupil and more willing than the ear,
Fine counsel is confusing, but example's always clear;

And the best of all the preachers are the men who live their creeds,
For to see good put in action is what everybody needs.
I soon can learn to do it if you'll let me see it done;
I can watch your hands in action, but your tongue too fast may run.

And the lecture you deliver may be very wise and true,
But I'd rather get my lessons by observing what you do;
For I might misunderstand you and the high advise you give,
But there's no misunderstanding how you act and how you live.

When I see a deed of kindness, I am eager to be kind.
When a weaker brother stumbles and a strong man stays behind
Just to see if he can help him, then the wish grows strong in me
To become as big and thoughtful as I know that friend to be.

And all travelers can witness that the best of guides today
Is not the one who tells them, but the one who shows the way.
One good man teaches many, men believe what they behold;
One deed of kindness noticed is worth forty that are told.

Who stands with men of honor learns to hold his honor dear,
For right living speaks a language which to every one is clear.
Though an able speaker charms me with his eloquence, I say,
I'd rather see a sermon than to hear one, any day.

--Poet: Edgar A. Guest 

Darrell:  If you ain’t helping, you hurtin’

Thursday, May 26, 2022

EINSTEIN AND THE PHYSICAL UNIVERSE

Born in Ulm, Bavaria (where I celebrated the New Year in 1996)

Nobel Prize Physics 1901 (first ever) German Roengten for his work in eponymous rays after using Lenard’s tube experiment and noting fluorescence of a painted cardboard screen of barium platinocyanide- Roentgen rays (X-ray) with Roentgenograms (xray radiograms)


Nobel Prize 1905  Hungarian German (anti-Semitic) Phillips Lenard (after in 1905 for cathode ray tubes, 10 years after the innovation, and 4 years after Roentgen, though his work was the foundation


Nobel Prize 1921  Swiss Einstein for photoelectric effect


While a clerk at a patent office in Bern, Switzerland (Einstein renounced his German citizenship), aged 26, married to Mileva Maric worked with Michele Besso, a friend and fellow patent clerk. I think I saw the same clock that he looked at in the town square. He approved the patent that would send a signal to other local clocks to stay synched.


Think like Einstein. Create “thought experiments”.


4 papers 1 year Annales der Physik (March-Sept 1905) ANNUS MIRABILIS


PHOTOELECTRIC EFFECT: A heuristic point of view of the production and transformation of light.June 9.                                       


Light is made of not just energy(waves) but also of particles “quanta” or photons. Think of sound or wind hitting water and creating waves. Think of how paper moves with the wind. Then take sunlight, and hold up a paper. It blocks, and does not propagate the light as waves alone. This is one of two pillars of modern physics: quantum mechanics, proving the existence of molecules.


BROWNIAN MOTION: On the movement of small particles suspended in a stationary liquid, as required by the molecular-kinetic theory of heat. July 18.     

                                                                                              

The physical phenomenon of Brownian motion showed that matter is composed of atoms.Think of a sugar cube dissolving in water. The glucose molecules are pulled away, and as the sugar dissolves, the coffee thickens. Here, Einstein proved how molecules moved, using a one dimensional mathematical proof that allowed the calculation of how far a molecule (imagine pollen in water under a microscope) would travel over time, without needing the more difficult proof of predicting where the molecule would go next.


SPECIAL RELATIVITY: On the Electrodynamics of Moving Bodies. Sept 26.                                                                                         


The speed of light is immutable, constant, and independent of the observer’s movement. Everything, except the (missing in Newtonian physics (MOTION, GRAVITATION, ABSOLUTE TIME) constant speed of light, is relative. Clark Maxwell believed this. Lorenz transformation found this “time dilation” to be a mathematical quirk. “The faster we move though space, the slower we move through time.” Everything, including time, distance, and mass, is relative. THIS WAS THE REDEFINITION OF THE UNIVERSE.  Time cannot move at different speeds, as much as we would like it, unless…..Imagine you are watching a train pass with a rider on it when two lightening strikes 100m apart at the exact same time on either side. If light moves at the same speed, on the train, you would see the lightening strikes were asynchronous, with the one you were moving towards first, and the one you were moving away from after, but the observer would see them hit simultaneously. Time is NOT absolute, and the speed of light is constant.  was solved when it was simplified to a one dimension. This would be followed up in 1915 to include acceleration and gravity. BEFORE, the universe was explained by the laws of Newton. AFTER, the universe was by relativity and quantum mechanics.


MASS-ENERGY EQUIVALENCE

Does the inertia of a body depend on its energy content?

E=mc2


FUNNY: Criticism of his first paper. He has no footnotes! Response. He has answered a question no one has asked before!


NOT SO FUNNY: Einstein’s brilliant wife, Mileva, is uncredited in his work, despite the precedent set by Pierre Curie, who was an ally to his wife Marie, credited for her work ,(Henri Becquerel was also awarded with them) as a condition for him accepting the Nobel Prize for Physics in 1903.


NB: Marie Curie would be the first sole woman to win a Nobel Prize in 1911, this time in chemistry. This makes her the only woman to win the award in two fields, to date, and only one of two winners to win in two fields, to date (Linus Pauling won both in chemistry and in peace).


NB: Newton also had an annus mirabilis in 1665-6 while self-confined to his home during the plague in Woolsthorpe, shortly after obtaining his BA from Cambridge, and while the university was closed. He used his time wisely, formulating the Law of Gravitation, Binomial theory (the basis of calculus), and Theory of Colour (light seen through prisms had three primary colours -red, yellow, and blue - that all others were derived from). According to the article by Thomas Levenson, in April 6, 2020 in the New Yorker, however, it is important not to make this a fairy tale. Newton worked on gravity before, during and after, and in his own words, he did it “by thinking on it continually”, not just as a new pass-time. He was 23.


Initially Newton thought that light was made of particles and Hook thought that light was made of waves, and Newton was “disproved”.  Over 200 years later, Einstein proved that both were right, and the idea of a wave particle was born. US scientist Millikan tried to disprove his theory, but ended up convinced that he was right. Both won the Nobel Prize in Physics for their work, Einstein in 1921 and Millikan in 1923.


Based on William Isaacson Einstein: His Life and Universe, Genius Season 1 Disney, BBVAOPENMIND.com Einstein’s Miracle Year, The New Yorker The Truth about Isaac Newton’s Productive Plague.

Monday, May 16, 2022

I LIKE GEOLOGISTS

 There are a few things that Princess Pirate complains about because I mention them too often. Hexagons are one.  The thing is, she points them out to me now, so I know that they are growing on her too. I mean, it’s a perfect shape, the hexagon. Except for when a designer goes a little crazy and tries to make something new like an elongated hexagon, which is always a mistake. Spring flowers like trillium are another. There is, however, an obsession that we share, and that I never get complaints about. We both love rocks. 

So I was looking for some cool sites to explore that have local geological interest. Since we had plans to go this past weekend for the Tulip Festival, I looked for information about Ottawa. When I found this website about Ottawa Gatineau Geoheritage Day, I was very excited. It was exactly what I was looking for. It had a map, and pictures of what we would see. 

One picture that particularly caught my interest was a familiar phenomenon that I had seen at McGill’s Redpath museum when it was open (pre-COVID). Unfortunately, we did miss the Geoheritage day, packed with tours, as it had already passed a couple weeks earlier. I did, however, identify where the formation of fossilized stromatolites (only two living Cyanobacteria reefs still exist - the Bahamas and Australia) were just off the Champlain bridge, and hoped to visit with my friend. In the end, she was game, and it was just the excuse we both needed for a wander around the streets and along the river on the Quebec side. 

I had noticed that, on three occasions, rocks described on the website were in “plane sight”. I wrote a comment (my inner editor could do no less) that I thought they may be mistaking the homonym for in “plain” site, and I was please to get an immediate answer back. It was even more gratifying that the mistakes were corrected within hours, accompanied by a hilarious email apologizing for the mistake because they did not have a pilot’s license! (Full disclosure, there is a term in geology that can be used with the word plane and not refer to aviation, but in this case I was right!)

Besides giving us places to go, I found that there was a book for sale that reminded me a geologic tour that  Princess Pirate and I loved in downtown Montreal from the Redpath museum. In this case, it was based in Ottawa, and advertised for $20, which seemed a reasonable amount for a risk of possible poor quality or disinterest. I reached out to Dr. Quentin Gall by email, and with a few back and forths, we agreed to meet just beside the Tulipfest.

I suppose I should have been more specific than deciding tomeet at a busy corner of his choosing without even exchanging phone numbers. We didn’t know who the other was, but he did say he was coming by bike, and there was a biker was wearing a very red obvious red shirt that passed the intersection twice while we walking nearer.  Encyclopedia strikes again! 

Quentin was charming, and full of enthusiasm for why I was looking for his book, and what I thought of the website.  He came with change (and wouldn’t keep a tip). The book was sponsored, so what I paid for two copies was a bargain for the work that was put into it! 

He asked me if I was a scientist, and I didn’t know quite how to answer. Not really, was the first thing that came to mind, quickly followed by the thought that, yes, I kind of am. It was the first time in a long time that when I admitted that I was a physician that the conversation didn’t change. He was a doctor too, and that was that, which was lovely.

The book was of such excellent quality, and arranged in small areas perfect for walking tours. He clearly could talk for hours about the rocks in the buildings listed in the book, but he was clear that he also provided the architectural context that I am more used to recognizing as a real bonus to my joy. The book also has an extensive intro to all the terms I need to know and some excellent charts in the back that have already given me a great deal of data that I have enjoyed, sitting at a table reading it. I cannot wait until I can walk around on a nice day and use it for reference. I should be able to make some educational guesses in Montreal with the glossary until I get back to Ottawa later this summer (for Hamilton!)

I’ll also have to return to the Champlain bridge late summer when the water table is low enough to see the fossilized stromatolites, and I think that will not have to twist my friend’s arm to come with me on a geological architectural walking tour next time I can come to town. She might even check it out before I make it back!

So, for now, I have in my calendar to look for Jane’s Walk next May, and look for more geological and heritage events in future.

Here’s another lead for another day. In this case, June 4, 2022. Alas, this year I am working. Most of them are Toronto and beyond, but there is one in Ottawa, in case that’s where you are in  3 weeks time!

Ontario has a heritage site for buildings and an open door day to visit.

HANNAH ARENDT

Hannah Arendt: German Jewish Philosopher

The Human Condition
Between Past and Future
On Revolution
Men in Dark Times
Crises of the Republic
The Life of the Mind

I found this DVD at the library about a woman I had never heard of named Hannah Arendt. I grew up with a family named Arendt, but we pronounced it like one word “aren’t” . It seems the original is two syllables, like A-rend(t). 

She was an academic tenured professor and wrote about a lot of ideas, but the movie’s story was about her most controversial work called Eichmann in Jerusalem. It had the usual effect on my historical knowledge. It expanded it in a highly relatable format that I love (movie investments are short and sweet, if the writing or the acting or the cinematography is good, and great if it all comes together!) 

Like too many religious critics, her work was often reduced to controversy by word of mouth and reactions based on superficial knowledge instead of actually reading the book! Even the revised audiobook I obtained had a long preamble trying to tell me what I should think about it. It gave context that I better understood than most starting the book, because I had watched the film. Still, it bothered me so I skipped ahead to make up my own mind.

The movie director features actual footage of Eichmann on trial, which is brilliant, and manages, like many European and occasionally Quebec films, to flip back and forth between German, English, and Hebrew casually, spanning her life and languages.

I can’t say yet if the script does justice to her words, and I suspect she has a lifetime of other thoughts that I do not have knowledge of that the screenwriter, as a university professor, most likely does. I do, however, like the way she thinks, making up her own mind, no matter how the cards are laid on the table.

From what I gather, the trial, set in Israel, and made possible with Mossad agents and President Ben Gurion’s involvement skewed the public from the get-go. I have very little knowledge of international law and how it works for crimes against humanity, but (spoiler alert) Eichmann is hanged in short order. 

So far, Hannah Arendt, of the film, is not sure this is the right outcome, which to me is a brave position for a Jewish woman who was interred in France for over a year during the war to have.

Afterwards, I found that McGill library lends the audiobook, and I did errands lost in the first three chapters of her book. I have lots more to learn.

What she clarified for me was the definition of totalitarianism. I don’t think I really understood what it meant before. She defines it as being separate from “despotism, tyranny, and dictatorship”, all more easily understood concepts. This is how she made the much necessary distinction: that totalitarianism “applied terror to subjugate mass populations, not just political adversaries”. 

She is quoted as saying “Niemand hat das Recht zu gehorchen” [No one has the right to obey]. She is credited (although may have later regretted) coining the phrase “banality of evil”, which is in the subtitle of the book on Eichmann’s trial. It was really an astute observation that given the right bureaucratic pressures, we could all be capable of systemic evil. Replace evil with racism or sexism, and it’s a little easier to see.

There is a lecture she gives that I will quote here (subtitled movie English may not be the perfect translation, but with my rudimentary German skills, it seemed to track well):

“Western tradition wrongly assumes that the greatest evils of mankind arise from selfishness. But in our century, evil has proven to be more radical than was previously thought. And now we know that the truest evil, the radical evil, has nothing to do with selfishness or any such understandable sinful motives. Instead, it is based on the following phenomenon; making human beings superfluous as human beings.”

She was talking about the concentration camp system, designed to  convince the prisoners that they were unnecessary before they were murdered. Work doesn’t free you. (ARBEIT MACHT FREI). No matter what you do in that system, it doesn’t matter. The system of the concentration camp teaches you that everything you do is senseless.

In this way, “absolute evil is when it exists, whether humans are in the system, or not”. I would argue (especially in light of the Ukrainian Russian war currently) that all humans are harmed by this evil. Yes, those in it who are not the victims have it better, but they too pay a price to the evil inherent in such systems of systemic racism and dehumanization. For me, the problem I cannot wrap my head around is; how then do you dismantle such a system without too much cost to the humans already serving as cogs in the wheel?

Arendt criticized the cooperation of the Jewish leaders as well as the failure to resist. I imagine my own life at that moment would feel incredibly valuable at the train station before you board the train, even though that would be the best place to revolt, before you are herded towards the gas chamber, or worse. I am not as sure as she was that this obviously the right choice. It must be incredibly hard to risk you life now when everything is screaming  for the need to survive until later. 

What are the options between resistance (which survival instinct may make impossible) and cooperation? 

Another problem I have is that this feels familiar. With no intention to diminish the concentration camp system level of evil, it feels like so many systems in which we humans play the cogs is rigged in such a way that evil exists. It is hard to see how to change it from within. The temptation is to revolt and dismantle, but no one can do that alone. 

So what is my personal responsibility? Eichman is criticized and condemned to death for upholding the rules of a system that ultimately lead to harm for others. How do you know if you are are doing your job for an evil end? If your terrorist cell just gets the victims to the murderers, and you don’t know the murderers, are you responsible? If you follow orders, and are disconnected to the next chain of events, should you blame yourself?

My thoughts are always to the mid-COVID pandemic health care system around me, and how do I find a way to change things that fail our patients. Patients and health care workers seems to be experiencing record high amounts of moral and personal distress in a system that seem, like Eichmann’s work, leads to inherent evils by making it so difficult to do the best by the patient because it is often at cross purposes with the efficiency of the system. 

It is so easy to “just do your job” and go home so overwhelmed and exhausted that you just want not to think about it. But years later, even if it was the job that never allowed time to consider, discuss, evaluate and criticize what the outcome was, aren’t you still to blame?

Those of us who try at every interaction to keep it human can succeed for a beautiful moment. It seems clear to me, however, that these acts of humanity are like cogs, being worn down and crushed again and again under the wheel, which feels no cost to our use and wear. We have to see this, and figure out how to change the way the wheel works. We can’t accept the consumption of our humanity and energy as the price to pay for the system to work. It is clear that right now, don’t win as a rule, then, but as an exception. We need to find a way to change the system so that it spares the cogs and the wheels turn without crushing those in the very system they were designed to serve.