THE THANKS I GET

I left my home this morning at 6:40. I had just over 6 hours of sleep because I got home from work last night at 10 pm, when I had supper and fed my cats and went to bed. I worked all day and just got home at 11:10 pm.

My requests for shift in March were emailed to me with this message:

Thank you to the precious few who sacrificed themselves in order to allow for publications.
Unfortunately it was once again the same people who always offer to help.
You can figure out who they are.  Most of them work 9/10 days in that week.

I have taken two March Breaks in 20 years. This year, I requested it off in advance, making the request on July 17th, 2017.

I was given 3 more shifts than I requested. I was scheduled on an evening  I did not give availability for. I work 6 evenings in a row, when I ask for no more than 2 or three, because I won't get enough sleep, and will be pulling 12 hours well into the night.

I am really tired, working hard, and I feel like I am meant to be shamed, as though my patriarchal scheduler and boss cares nothing for me or my work.

I am thankful for my colleagues today, who commented on my late stay, and refered to it as "my legacy", because we did send some home, get some admitted and even transferred one to another institution, and it looked so much better than when we had come in.

I am thankful for the glorious temperature to and from work of -8 and -9 with a beautiful layer of snow, and an hour and a half of commuting in those lovely conditions.

I am thankful to the colleagues who stopped by to say hi. The one who complimented my hair and tossed it. The resident who casted a wrist and sent the patient home.

I am thankful to my little girl who was doing her homework when I called, and texted me to get an internet link for an upcoming assignment. Who is excited to go to Regina with me in February when other kids are going to Disney!

So, to my boss, who makes me feel like I don't sacrifice, but is killing me slowly while taking me for granted: I think there are better ways to get people motivated. I feel like I am sacrificing to cover the rest of the month, but for thankless reasons. I don't appreciate that you didn't answer my email, asking for a change in the mistake of scheduling me on a day I didn't give availability. And I don't feel like giving any more availability when it's tough on me, because the sacrifice I do make isn't appreciated anyways.