DURA MATER

 My autobiography title translates roughly as tough mother. It is, in part, a story of one of my favourite aspects of life; relating to my daughter. I tell her stories calling her Princess Pirate. Tonight she created a new one when she said good night. I kissed her on her head in a hug, and she said in her best teen voice, “Ugh, you are killing me with kisses!”

I told her a Princess Pirate story recently, and she thought that I was the Queen and her dad was the Pirate, when I always thought it was the other way around.

He liked (and took) the china, crystal glasses, and Waterford utensils. He stayed unemployed for long periods of his life because so many jobs he was eligible for were “beneath” him. He was content to live a tiny life, and only went along, never inspiring or creating any adventures. 

I had the drive to travel, try new things, and do knew things or at least fun things we like. I could care less about china, or crystal, although I do like the feel of well made utensil! I will do whatever it takes, because who else is going to do it if not me?

I am not sure which version bothers me more. As a queen, I have no King, but how does he get the exciting role of pirate? Because this is what male culture assumes, even to my child? It’s not based on his personality, surely?

As the pirate, I feel I am appropriately counter culture, and suits me the best in the coupling of two fantasies that created the amazing Princess Pirate!

SALT AND INTENTION

 FOR PRINCESS PIRATE

I am on the train today and trying to read a book for book club. As I have told you, I don’t like it and I’m not sure I will finish. It doesn’t draw me right now like Rick Riordan’s series on Jason does. So I just finished a page and a half, I am already off on a tangent based on this fact: The communist leader of China named Mao, in attempt to improve literacy, simplified the shared characters of Chinese and Japanese to a total of 40,000. This is a number that seems, to me as an English speaker, attainable. But it’s an investment of time, and it would still take a lot of time, so most of us will not learn them. Honestly most of us won’t even try.

Sometimes I think, at least I am one of the those who have tried and fail. I think this a good thing, but it is only the first step, and it’s important that I not feel too proud, because it is truly only a good thing if a keep on trying after I fail. 

The book Salt is explaining the origin of soy sauce. The Chinese salted their fish to keep longer, and this is the basis of Asian cooking. The word is Jiang. The salt and fish had soya added to it. Eventually the fish was left out of it, and it was called Jiangyu. After the Chinese, Japan started using their own soya sauce and called it Shoyu. They industrialized it so we probably got it from Japan before China. We call it soya sauce, and despite being two different words in two different languages, the character for both Chinese and Japanese is identical. 

It got me to think about the idea that it takes 10,000 times to do something well. It’s actually necessary that you do it with intention, and, therefore, improve what you are doing, but that’s another story. I started to do the math. If you or I do something every day, that’s 365 days a year. In three years that’s a thousand times. Imagine how easy it is for 3 years to go by without doing anything. It takes a tremendous amount of intention, planning, and action, but it is easily started. 30 years every day, you get to 10, 000 times. Actually, it’s 27 years, 145 years. 

The truth is, like usual, somewhere in between. Look at what you did in your first three years. Sure, you walk and run better than ever, but you were walking and talking and running and eating and laughing and learning in that short period of time, with leaps and bounds of improvement. One year of every day becomes three years, and three years of intention is a remarkable improvement. 

So, Princess Pirate, start something today. Do it again tomorrow. Plan what you want for your future and work towards it. It may take a long time, but anything is possible if you start it today!

THE ORIGIN STORY

My friend asked me last night what has inspired my love of the Chateau Laurier. I would have thought that I was born with an innate love of Fairmont hotels, but I would have been mistaken.

My earliest memory of a Canadian Pacific (CP: now the modern Fairmont) castle-like hotel was a trip that my family took to Banff. It is a memory stitched together with just a few images. Some of my memories may not have been the same year or even in the right place, but there are two things I remember strongly: waking up at least one day in the campground and doubting my dad’s proclamation that we were in the mountains, until the fog finally lifted to reveal the rock face that had been completely obscured in the dark right beside our tent, and the outrageous and hilarious freedom of wearing garbage bags with our arms poked through because of rain, feeling none of the usual embarrassment in knowing that everyone we met was a stranger anyways. 

I have a vague memory of stopping for a hot chocolate in the lobby of the Banff Springs Hotel, but maybe it was just a look in the lobby. I have a picture of the hotel that must have been taken from some height, and looking down into the valley, the hotel was the scale of Neuschwannstein, and resembled the castles that I later knew were as an adult in Europe, with the ruins of Heidelberg found in the fog being a strong memory with no photo. When I moved to Montreal, I am not sure I understood the breadth of the CP hotels that spanned the country. I think that Quebec city’s Chateau Frontenac (CF) may have been my only knowledge of a hotel with the turrets and dramatic rooftops outside of the Rockie Mountains, but I am even unsure of that timeline, and that I would have connected the two spanning such a distance as where I grew up to where I ended up. 

What I do know was that I started a file folder with the bills and room cards for all my Fairmont Hotel stays over the years, and this is the timeline that I am more certain of, although given memory’s unreliability, there is still some artistic license likely to be present.

From my records;

My first Fairmont booking was for a conference in Toronto called the North York Emergency Medicine. It was 2007, and I did not go alone, leaving my then husband and my one year old daughter to their own devices while I spent long days learning. I remember that we took pictures in our bathrobes, and that my daughter was just starting to walk with confidence, using a toddler sized rolling walker and enjoying the enormous carpeted floors of  the lobbies and hallways. The hotel was the Royal York, and I can’t remember if it was this visit, or another in 2009, but we took the train that actually brought us to the train station that still serves the hotel. 

The following year, 2008, we booked a room at the Hotel Frontenac in the summer, and now we full blown chased after the little tyke who ran away if she could! No walker needed!

In 2009, I indulged in a night to celebrate my birthday, staying at the Queen Elizabeth Hotel in hometown Montreal, with a view down on my favourite reminder of Rome (Vatican City, actually) that is Mary Queen of the World cathedral, and the incredible Sun Life Building that sits kitty-corner to it. 

The Chateau Laurier was next, during a year that I was developing the intention of becoming a  premier member.  That year was 2011, and there was a midwinter promotion in concert with the Holtz Spa in the nearby Byward market. I went with two friends that I knew from a group of long time friends. At the time I don’t think we had spent any time together by ourselves, but that trip changed things. Both of these women have become very important to me, likely beginning with that stay.  This also is likely to be the start of the idea for the book I am on day three writing. Certainly, CL is the closest Fairmont hotel to me unless I stay in Montreal, so has been the easiest to visit. It has never had the heart stopping increases in price that CF has had, and it is now officially the CP hotel that I have visited the most, thanks to my recent visit there with one of the two women that accompanied me there ten years ago. 

The three characters may have developed on a different timeline, but it is interesting to see the parallel of three women from that visit. I know that two of my original characters were based on others, and not on my travel companions, but even down to the room we had with 3 separate beds and a view to Parliament Hill feels primordial to where my story has evolved from. I also wonder if all my reading of Nancy Drew (ND) and her two best friends could have played a part. I think I may have even added a boyfriend, like Ned, to balance out the estrogen. The Mystery at Chateau Laurier was the original title, which sounds like a ND mystery, and the name stuck until my first NaNoWriMo in 2019, when I started to fill in the characters, but the mystery plot never developed, or was very awkward. 

I started going to the American College of Emergency Physicians (ACEP) conferences beginning in 2011, and travelled to quite a few cities this way. I found the cost of the exchange rate, and the demand in the US cities almost unaffordable, so was not able to consistently stay at a Fairmont. I did enjoy my stay so much in Boston at the Copley Plaza that I returned with my family, this time with a time booked to walk their lobby dog named Caty (pronounced Katey). I remember a little room in San Francisco that was the peak of what I was willing to pay for a night, especially for a room that I was literally only using to sleep in. It was steep in price, but also in real estate, and I when the sting of the cost wore off, I was glad to have stayed truly in the heart of San Fran, even if it was just for a short time. 

I started this blog in 2012 on a spinoff trip as a Rick Steves superfan with an incredible stay at the Fairmont Seattle. Eating alone turned out to heighten each meal that I ate, and certain foods still come up as fond memories. Spanish fig loaf found in a brick at the international section at the grocery store, and several failed attempts to make the breaded cheese croutons that topped a vegetable bisque soup come immediately to mind. The food was accompanied by the luxurious surroundings and a pianist! I can also recommend that fall is a great time for eating out!  

Today I was reminded why I had the idea of a treasure hunt, when I found an envelope from October 26th, 2013 addressed to Princess Pirate, Room 373, and was dotted with pastel coloured and sparkly stickers in the shape of hearts and with happy horse faces . I don’t remember the ruse, but I wrote at the top, I believe addressed to the front desk staff:

BONJOUR. LAISSEZ MOI Á LA RÉCEPTION

The first clue must have been hidden in plain sight in the room, left to be found.

It read:

Good morning, Rebecca! 

Today I have a treasure hunt for you! 

The first clue is waiting for you at the lobby’s front desk, where I checked in. Just ask for a message for room 373. 

Good luck,

Love, 

Mom (smiley face emoji)

The second clue read:

Ask your daddy to help you find Albert Einstein’s photograph. 

Below it is a desk. 

Check the right drawer for your next clue.

P.S. This poodle is for decorating our shoelaces.

The third clue read:

Good job!

You found the next clue! 

(Editor’s note: I am hearing Blue’s Clues in my head now. I think that might have been my inspiration. Unfortunately it may have also been my aspiration. This was not great work, which is why I have had so much trouble making it into an adventure worthy of a novel!)

This place I found when I visited the castle last winter.

I loved it and am so happy to use it’s hiding place today!

Don’t leave the room, but look for a lamp with a stack of books. 

Don’t be afraid to be a detective. 

Be curious - I promise it won’t break!

The fourth clue was the last clue, and it read:

Wow, that was the toughest spot to find. 

Hope you are having fun!

Now it is time to return to your room.

Find the “safest” place and press the numbers of your birthday - month. 

Don’t forget to put 0 (zero) in the tens spot + day. 

(Editor’s note: I think this is confusing, and I don’t remember what the gift was!)

Hope this is a good gift for a princess!

Enjoy your castle!

I have long admired the construct of a murder mysterday, but before binge-watching was a thing, the closest thing we could come to was binging a series of books, which was hard to do given the constant wait required repetitively for the next book in the series to be released to you after putting it on hold. Even then, with authors like Agatha Christie who had long ago finished writing, it seemed like a far-fetched idea to have so many murders around one person, usually in a small space, or in a small town. These eventually transitioned to murder mystery shows, and the sequence of so many victims quickly became too terrible for me to bear. So I have still never read all of Agatha Christie’s books, and I don’t binge watch crime shows for fear of becoming so despondant as to be suicidal. I like the “twist” though, and when I started writing this book in 2019, I thought that I would take inspiration from the idea of a letter, but it turned out not to be a very interesting device for a plot twist. 

I took inspiration at least for the protagonist Stephanie from a Tissot painting that I have loved for a long time that hangs in the National Gallery of Canada called The Letter. It is a medium sized painting set in a beautiful garden. A woman with an elegant black gown and hat from the late 19th century holds a letter in her gloved hands that she is actively shredding. The multiple pieces hang impossibly in the air behind her, as if caught by an updraft. She is surrounded by fallen horsetail chestnuts, so I always imagined the park to be in Paris. She stands on the grass, which is a big no-no in a park in France, and there is only one table behind, so although I had imagined that she was in a public place, maybe she is at her own private residence and the man behind is not a waiter but a footman maybe. I don’t know what is happening, but her face seems confident, making the expression closest to disgust. Maybe she has  been stood up with a letter carrying the excuse? Whatever is happening, she is not devastated, but this is just the beginning of a story in my mind. She is my first truly original character. She is not based on anyone I know. She is her own persona, although I have to admit, she is also the character most like myself!

So there you have it. A story written over two Novembers, from 2019-2021, started a long time ago. The three women characters have been developing on paper and in my mind for along time, and they probably met the Chateau Laurier during a cold a grey fall in 2011. It was not a trip very far away, but that weekend changed my life. It brought me to dear friendship with two extraordinary women, had me fall in love with the architecture and history of the hotel, and started my writing inspiration for the story that continues to challenge me today!

FIRST REAL SNOW YESTERDAY

Moving the penguins to the North Pole. Without snow, we couldn't do it until today!

FRIDAY, EVERY OTHER WEEK

 I am always surprised at how low I can go on the day I say good-bye to my girl for another week at her dad's.

It's been almost 6 years since she left for a new apartment. It used to be that it was the end of the weekend, and I would dread beginning the week. A void was left in my heart every other week. 

There were many shifts I went in for in tears, with palpitations.

Eventually, it became clear to me that the schoolweek that followed depended on the weekend before, and after a few months of relentless advocacy, the day to say goodbye became Friday. 

It has evolved from an evening of tears, complete with sobbing to a recurrent disappointment with plans falling through and a bag of potato chips and a bag of licorice.

SNOW GAMES

Princess Pirate in her natural habitat, training dragons and defending against monsters from angry coconuts to hydra

Between the two of us, we almost didn't go out at all. The day had gone fast and the sun was setting.  We were supposed to get some exercise and we both wanted to do it outside. Princess Pirate was ready to go out when I saw that the snow had started to turn to rain and changed my mind. I thought about the options and the outdoors was the best place to do it. If we dressed properly, we'd be fine even with the weather. I sent her out the front to check if the sunset changed the sleet to snow. Now it was her turn to back out, but I started getting out our snow pants and the most rain resistant winter jackets before we could change our mind again.

I had the forethought to save her good parka and hat and a pair of mitts to stay dry for the next day at school. We went out to the local park dragging the toboggan. PP didn't want to sled, but she liked to be pulled around the paths and through the woods. I wished I could run for longer, but whatever I could do was going to be good cardio. 

We did a few rounds, climbed mountains of snow, and fell a lot. It was sticky heavy wet snow, and the walking through it was unpredictable. On moment we fell deep into it, with our boot stuck, leaving us to fall forward so that we could turn around to dig ourself out. I thought that if you could film us and then erase the snow, like the nighttime technology that makes it seems like day, it would be ridiculous looking, with us falling forward and sideways oddly and at random times!  The snow was so thick in the air it was cloudy in the light. 

We were about to leave, and my idea to go sledding was not popular enough to go to the school where the hill was larger. I had her in the sled and I tried to drag her up the tiny hill in the park before we left. Again, PP stated her dislike of sledding, so I tried to slide down but found it too slow to be fun. She had made a body slide in the meantime and told me to check it out. It was pretty good! I brought the sled up for her to try once before we left. She took it down and had a little fun. I came down, thinking I would pull her home but by the time I was at the bottom, she was going back up for another round. This is when the game began. 

Wait for me, I cried, as I reached the bottom of the hill, and as I raced up, she grinned and slid down before I could get to the top! I ran downhill as fast as I can, and she laughed and raced up the other side of the hill. I lunged after the sled, but was too slow, and laughing chased her uphill again fruitlessly. She jumped in the toboggan and laughed gleefully, keeping ahead of me, and taking run after run down the hill in the sled.

By the end we were breathless, laughing, and PP liked sledding again. It felt like a Laurel and Hardy skit! It was the highlight of both our weeks.  

We walked home happy and wet, surprised to see it was 2 hours later and we had forgotten to eat supper!

Another fond memory to remember on the days when it seems like the weather might not be a good enough excuse to go outside.

PRINCESS PIRATE 2020

Negotiates her birthday party to an all day affair when all her friends can't come at the same time, according to her pre-party survey. Result: 9 am to 8 pm! Cat breeds with Athina. Royal dressup (girls and stuffies) with Cynthia.

After buying her a new pair of skates to replace those that were too small for her: "Don't make me go skating today. It'll ruin my birthday!"

Having an afternoon snack while I drink a cinnamon spice tea, while plugging her nose: "That stinks like a skunk, eating cinnamon".

"I have a nose that's a combination of your nose and my dad's nose. I smell too well, like you, but I don't know what I am smelling, like dad!"

Climbing snow mountains made by snowplows in parking lots: sliding down after ice clumps aka "gems".

Still taking baths with Ariel mermaid, pitchers, and other water toys.

Reading together Percy Jackson and the Last Olympian and The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. On her own reading the Wings of Fire series.

Drawing a character for French class: a Austrian princess going on her last trip before becoming queen.

Screen shots of four post medieval beds from french Chateau.

While talking to neighbour Vicky with two dogs, I turn around to find she is laying supine on the snow covered street in front of our house, oblivious to traffic. Afterwards, when asked why, she said one of the dogs looked cold, and she was offering up her body to stand on while we talked!

Lipgloss and eye shadow on her way to school.

Overusing the word random, for things that aren't random.

Playing outside in the snow: somersaulting backwards off of a hill off the driveway, laying curled up under the table on the deck, covered in snow when you re-enter.

Writing about "A"; telling a story about him having a concussion and calling attention away from him by referring to him as "some random kid".

Colouring a picture of A and his concussion. Sketching him and his smile.

Making a poster against idling at your dad's work when Greta Thunberg came to town (September 27, 2019), showing it on the way home to some strangers in the across the street neighbour's driveway, then worrying that they would follow you, so taking the back way around the house, and going down to the basement, changing your ponytail to the side and turning your coat inside out and putting on a mask to disguise yourself, then vowing never to do it again. (You told this story to me today, which explains why I found your poster high in your closet, hidden away, months ago).

Reading out loud in French class!

Saying no to building a snowman!

Flu - she sleeps for 4 days, and doesn't even complain when I suggest she doesn't go to school. Her fever breaks on Tuesday but she asks not to go to school on Wednesday. I know without a doubt that she is not feeling well if she doesn't want to go to school! Usually that's not going to happen!  (Maybe now she will wash her hands before eating lunch?)

Using the microwave and frother for an elaborate tepid chocolate milk, with cocoa and sugar 1:3 from scratch.

Climbing banks of snow.

Battling monsters and teaching mythical creatures with a sword, running around the Terra Cotta Woods, in Tierwelt and Terra Aragon, and the back yard.

Mourning school closure due to COVID-19. Missing not only friends, but those who aren't friends.

Dressed up, prepared and on time for zoom classes.

Making mint/lemon thyme water and chives on meals as soon as the garden grows.

Building a fort behind the shed, and reinforcing it with leftover clothesline and the hard wood of cut down maples.  

Breaks her ankle jumping of piles of gravel from street construction, making swimming and hiking a brief, but end of summer event.

Prepares for our road trip, reluctantly leaving crutches behind, and having prepared an activity package with things to do and a page a day to write a journal in. 

Proves herself to be teenager, needing wifi every 2-3 days on our camping trip minimum!

Hikes her first Charlevoix mountain in Grand-Jardins park just after getting the okay to take off her walking cast.

She’s willing to be homeless and risk sleeping  in the car in order to take a three week trip of a lifetime up and down the Gaspé Coast, through Charlevoix, along the Saguenay, and around Lac St. Jean to La Mauricie and South shore.

Swims in the blueberry coloured Lac Saint Jean, walks through tidal pools and snorkels in Yamaska Lake, relentlessly attempting to catch minnows that always elude her.

Finally learns to use literally in a literal, not figurative, way!

Goes back to school with masks and COVID madness, and makes it work.

After school with Cynthia, with snacks.

First opera: La Boheme by Puccini

First live musical: Hamilton

Not going halloweening!

Eats and enjoys chickpea pumpkin curry.

Beets and butternut squash are good!

First one-handed cartwheel in the basement!

Making her first batch of crêpes by herself and all of them were beautiful and better than mine!

Making pesto pizza by herself.

Matching pyjamas with her Maplelea doll Brianne with dancing polar bears and glow-in-the-dark Northern lights for Christmas

Made batches of dipped pretzels for a crowd as a secret mission!

Walking between house and apartment for exercise and necessity.

Shopping independently in the mall for presents and for herself.

Buying from a grocery list when I was waiting for a COVID screen result to come back, and under budget!

Cracked a pecan, almond, walnut, and hazelnut for the first time.

Dressing up for Opa’s death anniversary and going for a walk-in the park.

Writing and singing sons and choreographing dances.

Learns to swallow pills, to take iron for anemia.

Preps and participates in her first NaNoWriMo!

Made Christmas cards for classmates and teachers with animal facts and web links, encouraging them to “Stay Curious”!

 

Watched an online version of the nutcracker to keep the tradition that’s been going strong for watching the ballet every year for almost a decade.

Stays up to 11 pm decorating my doorway, hallway and living/dining rooms with streamers and banners (Stay in bed, I'm TPing the house!) the day before my birthday, setting the expectation of my COVID birthday as my "worst birthday ever" and then making it one the best!

Sitting in the mudroom keeping a little white abandoned kitty full of fleas company, sitting so still her leg fell asleep because Snowstorm had keeled over asleep in her lap too!

Staying up past midnight on NEW YEAR'S EVE later than both her mom and dad!

Drew/painted her self-portrait with pointillism AND surrealism styles.

WEEK TEN IN THE TIME OF COVID

I am having regular zoom meeting with the chicks, whatsapp meetings with the neighbours, and PP has a zoom account and regularly schedules an hour with a friend on the weekend days. Facetime works with my parents, but in all of them, there are delays that are hard to predict, and it's rarely perfect on both sides.
We talk about ped days and long weekends with a distanced nostalgia that seems surreal.
Our neighbours were going for a 15 minute 2m chat with a lawn chair down the street.
The day starts when we wake up. I do not miss the school week starting at 7 am at all.
We have lunch on the back patio every day.
We can hear a robin land before we see it. The birdsong is wonderful, and the trees are full of interesting buds that I never noticed before.
Cali has stopped ducking at the clouds when she is outside, and actually runs up willingly to get her collar on instead of avoiding it.
Covid admissions and ICU admissions are holding stable with cars back on the street. The number of cases never drop, but they aren't increasing either.
The skies are still quiet, with a prop plane being met with as much excitement as on Fantasy Island!
Animal club was a presentation of animal facts, with Brianne presenting on the true Lemming, PP on the extinct Guadaloupe Caracara, and my unicorn, Glitter, presenting on the Eastern Cottontail, a rabbit that lives in our yard!
We went out to chase the sunset, and found jack pines (2 needle bundles), a block long obstacle course in chalk, neighbours garbage picking for bikes, Venus and a few bright stars (?Pollux and Castor), and 3 bats!
School starts back tomorrow online, and PP is excited.
Elementary schools are NOT starting back after all. A friend in Education mentioned that they may need to use the high schools for elementary school kids to have enough space, and high school might be online next year.
Golf and tennis are opening, but the pool opening is still not clear. I am hope for lane swimming a few times a week, but we shall see.
Our street construction is to start tomorrow, and may go on until August.
PP made currant scones today, from turning on the oven to measuring and mixing the ingredients. I only formed the disc and cut the sticky dough into 8ths. She put it in and out of the oven, and they were delicious!
The trilliums are blooming and the beech trees burst open their leaves.
Every one of the tulips were bitten off, but the one (of 3) that pay homage to Herman at least survived to grace my table with a sunny yellow colour.
Mother's Day was my first all alone. I worked, and PP sent me a puzzle she had worked hard at. I had hoped to walk with her in the trilliums the next day, but she is concerned about going back and forth, in case I have COVID. I am grateful she comes every Friday she does, for a full myriad of reasons.
Screening at work was of everyone, since a resident tested positive and worked the days before. I was negative, now my second screen, this time without symptoms. My nasal congestion responds to antihistamines, was present since March 6th on returning home from Idaho, and is getting better.
Two Sikh brothers shaved their beards (one of five sacred tenents of their religion) so that they could be finally fitted for N95 masks. Smoking HCWs are not distancing, and the arrival of free food seems to be received with pre-Covid enthusiasm, even when sharing seems like Russian Roulette.
We planted sprouting onions and potatoes, pepper and apple seed, and are eating chives on everything. Lemon thyme is more decorative than tasty in water, but the mint and oregano are showing promise.
There are ants under every stone we have to turn up, and pansies all along the fence in the back yard.
Our neighbour John has squirrels directly going into his attic through a hole in the back of his house, and he mistakenly believes that the neighbour that helped him get the tree off his roof caused it to fall over. He still seems in relatively good health, and gets his own groceries delivered, but his paranoid delusions and memory are definitely worsening.
Libraries are supposed to be opening next week for books placed on hold. Their advice is not to touch them for 5 days.
British Bakeoff Season Nine is a current favourite.
A Buffalo 1000 piece puzzle with normal pieces and a calico and a tabby cat was completed with pleasure.
A trip to Wales and Greece are on the bucket list.
PP told an amazing version of Percy from Rick Riordan's Greek Heroes book.
A book I have searched for since Grade 3, To Nowhere and back, came and PP dove right in!

WEEK NINE IN THE TIME OF COVID

Signs of spring - birdwatching, geese returning, Forsythia blooming, tulips pushing, ground hog grazing, trout lillies blooming

Snow falling on waking, melted in minutes

11 1/2 hour sleep

Easter candy

Scattegories on video chat with family - used our own list including tough categories (marsupials, tidal pool creatures)- surprisingly easy to think you are doing well while using the wrong letter!

Calico shedding

Dress-up for 12 minutes at school locker cleanout

Google hangout

Math zoom

No homework this week

Cleanup behind cabana with mud work

Gardening

Animal website updates

Animal club meeting at cat rock too cold - indoors

The Great British Bake off

Lions in Trees (sad ending, Disney)

Beowulf A New Retelling (read together, initially with complaint, then begging to continue)

Bathing for an hour - every toy left

Clean up desk and dresser - never-ending pile in a rubbermaid container

A little lego

A lot of Brianne teaching and dresser

Panache homework (mom)

Snowbirds from a distance

Terra Cotta hikes

Front yard chats

Late night bed times (10-10:15)

Eye rolling

Ready for announcement back to school May 18th

Having your 14 year old home without school or homework or pool or playdates or activities: PRICELESS

MEMORY PROBLEMS AND DYSGRAPHIA INTERVENTIONS (BRAIN FRAME, EMPOWER)

I curse the person who invented the term: See 1 Do 1 Teach 1. It is a goal post set too high too often.

My daughter struggles with a type of processing that falls under the heading of expressive speech (a type of Dysgraphia). It was described today by the Speech Therapist as a cognitive problem of memory, and struggles with sequencing, in stories, paragraphs, and even phrases of a sentence.

Thankfully, although she was apparently emotional about it, she has been clear at school that she wants the help they want to give her! And she has been good at advocating for herself.

One of the recommendations is that she needs to have things repeated in order to learn them. As a teacher friend would say, "Duh!" So that's simple! Repeat that, please!

Another is extra time.

A quiet place.

Proofreading should be out loud. In this day and age, Siri can do that for you! There are adaptation on every device these days that should make it easier than ever. When I was in high school, I had to use a tape recorder and record my own voice to memory texts!

As a parent, I need to confirm she understand the instructions by asking for a paraphrase of the task, and cue her to proofread out loud.

Two devices are being taught to her by the Speech Therapist (good name change from Speech Pathologist):

1. BRAIN FRAMES

GET READY - what do I need? Gather it together in one place.
DO
DONE

Look forward to look back, meaning read the WHOLE recipe before you start cooking.

This resource (slideshow on Executive Function Skills) shows the PDF as well as whole lot of other ideas to help the essential processing memory. It includes how working memory works, how struggles occur, interventions suggested. Some include: give written/visual directions in addition to verbal, break down large tasks into smaller ones, highlight, Cornell Notetaking, reduce processing demands by using a graphic organizer or writing rubric (OREOS, Essay Writing Outline) for student to refer to, create a work system, must do (vegetables) and can do (dessert) folders. There are resources and apps to look at. 

Cornell Note Taking Method is found in various template forms. Here is a link to a google doc. Here is a link to download a word doc.

This is a slide show for dyslexia, but I think anyone can benefit from the tips (including wannabe novelists!) It talks about executive function and oral language, breaks down vocabulary with shapes as diagramming symbols, and shows the Brain Frames six part infographic. 

It includes (thanks to images from Miss Francine):

Showing relationships

Sequencing

Telling

Categorizing

Showing cause/effect

Comparison/contrast

Seeing someone else's completed task can help.

2. EMPOWER (trademarked so couldn't find) CHECKLIST

I did find an elaborated paragraph for EmPOWER that breaks down like this:

Start with a TOPIC SENTENCE (fact or opinion that you will discuss and prove0

Then FRED (Facts Reasons Examples Details) SAY MORE, then FRED SAY MORE, then FRED SAY MORE, then FRED SAY MORE

Finally SO WHAT. 

3. Test Prep Sheet 

REACH FOR THE STARS

Tonight Princess Pirate and I went to the library and met astronaut Dr. Dave Williams. It reminded me of a visit to her grade two classroom, and we asked him if he had ever come, since he was from the city next to ours and met his wife at our local pool. I wasn't there but my daughter had quite a few stories of how astronauts go to the bathroom, and even built a rocket from a milk carton.

Rocket ship inspired by NASA

Since my memory failed, I did a little google search. Turns out the local connection to NASA was not an astronaut, but an educator who did a great job named Brian Ewenson. It was quite an event, and it impacted me as a parent, as well as my kid. But she didn't remember much, so it was fun to go tonight and hear again about space.

The message of the night was really about planetary stewardship. This is a theme close to my heart, and link to a movie and an exhibit called Anthropocene that friends across the country have recommended to me.

Dave Williams was raised in the West Island, in Beaconsfield. He referred to another Canadian aquanaut, Dr. Joe McGuinness. He was a great speaker, and sure had an inspiring story to tell. His career started as a dream, when it was literally impossible for a child from Canada to become an astronaut. But it became possible, after he became an aquanaut, and then a neuroscientist and then an MD after applying more than once, and being told he might struggle, but graduating top of his class. So when the next mission for NASA was looking to sent a crew to study neuroscience, he was a perfect fit. I had actually heard him speak in a medical forum, about the culture at the Southlake Health Centre, where he was CEO for several years following Emergency Medicine at the Toronto trauma centre Sunnybrooke. He had also been diagnosed with cancer and came back from treatment for a second spacewalk voyage.

He travelled on the space ship Columbia in 1998.  I was able to see a launch space shuttle Discovery while on vacation with my family when I was 13 on January 12, 1986, so I remember the excitement was amazing. This was before the Challenger flight was lost in 1987 with first teacher on board, that still weighs on my memory each time a shuttle is launched. He lost friends on the final failed mission of the Columbia in 2003. His second trip, after cancer treatment, and that flight, was on a shuttle named Endeavor in 2017. He had four space walks totally over 17 hours and operated on animal nerves in space.

There was a lot of name-dropping, from Tom Cruise to Rick Hansen. I liked the term he picked up from Rick. Be a difference-maker!

"Each of us has the ability to make a difference."
--Rick Hansen

His life really was proof of this statement:

"It is difficult to say what is impossible, for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today and the reality of tomorrow."
--Robert H Schuller

There were a plethora of other meaningful quotes.

"You can live a lifetime in a moment."
--Ted Rosenthal

"A ship in harbour is safe, but that is not what ships are built for."
--John A. Shedd

"I want to stand as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all the kinds of things you can't see from the center."
--Kurt Vonnegut

A few thoughts of the peculiarities of space: when they first arrive, their faces are congested and their legs provide the fluid, so that their taste and smell takes a while to come back. Blood in a surgery floats in a sphere not far from the field, so it's not hard to clean up. The space station orbits the earth every 90 minutes, with a sunset and sunrise every 45. They travel at Mock 25 speed, so 8 km a second to start, and continue to do so up in space, but it feels like they are moving slowly, like you see in the footage. There is statistically life on another planet, but this is our best one. We need to take care of it! If you want to see the difference, NASA has images of earth over the last 40 years for public access, and it's not hard to see the changes.

Take a look at his books: Defying Limits, and a series of four for kids that sound really fun (To Burp or Not to Burp).

Trying on a spacesuit, a little big

Our solar system

So thanks to Dr. Williams tonight for an inspiring talk and an autograph for a teen he inspired to believe that nothing is impossible, take care of the planet, and don't give up when others discourage you. Try again, dream big, and reach for the stars!

ANNE SULLIVAN: THE MIRACLE WORKER

This afternoon I took Princess Pirate to the her first play outside of kid's theatre and her affiliated high school. I was a little nervous when I saw the crowd, because I saw no other children in the lobby, but the character of Helen Keller was to be played by an 11 year old girl, so I thought it was the right story for her to hear. Lakeshore Players opened the season with The Miracle Worker.

The play, and movie, were familiar to me, although I am not entirely sure why. I don't have specific memories of seeing the play, or a movie, of which there are several, made for television and the big screen. I probably read a book after a movie came out, with the few memories I have are photos of Anne Sullivan in those round dark glasses, and it wasn't from real footage, but of an actress from a black and white version of the film. There are several movies made, but this is the one I recognized. Of note, there is a colour version by Disney that might be worth tracking down, and a couple of sequels to look for: Monday After The Miracle and Helen Keller: Miracle Continues.

We dressed up, and Brianne came with us. As requested, we all wore pearls! We were happily surprised to find out that row E was the second row in the theatre, and there was no one in front of PP, so her view was excellent. The play starts in Alabama, a fact I had totally forgotten. To me, her connection to Alexander Graham Bell put her in New England in my memory, where the Boston school of Deaf/Mute had invited AGB to instruct the "Visible Speech Language" that he had mastered, inspired by his phonetian father and deaf mother (during his childhood).

The theme of water was well done from beginning to end of the epiphany that broke down the barriers to Helen Keller's isolated world. At the time of the play, Helen Keller was the age of 6 and Anne Sullivan 20. From the age of 19 months, following a febrile illness, Helen Keller was deaf and blind. But as an infant she had learned the beginnings of speech, and her first word was recalled as "wa-wa", and the moment she finally connected the letters being signed into her hand was after actually pumping water she had spilt at the table on her return to her family, after being taken away for a short two weeks to gain her teacher's trust and reestablish discipline that her family was not able to give her out of their pity. This is the primordial story that I loved and carried with me.

But this time, from the title to the closing scene, I realized that this story was not about Helen Keller. It was about her teacher, and what a formidable educator she was! Blind herself, but restored surgically, she wore tinted glasses to relieve her from the glare of natural light. She had outlived her younger brother, who died in the Almhouse they were in after their mother's death. Because of another blind resident, she learned of the Perkins School for the Blind, and made an opportunity to introduce herself and was accepted as a pupil there. She entered illiterate, and left a teacher, with the rare skill of being already apt at commicating with another student there who was deaf blind: Laura Bridgman.

The spirit of Anne and her honesty about what she knows and does not was remarkable, and the essence of the play, written by William Gibson, a man who often wrote about woman triumphing, according to the playbill. I really enjoyed the brief glimpse into her life at this story telling. Now, having heard the story of Helen Keller, I want to get to known Anne Sullivan.

We laughed and we cried, and when the play came to a rapid close, we were left with a lot to talk about and a poster of the alphabet and a few memories of my grandma's roommate and her ability to teach American Sign Language (ASL) and a brief course at the library when I was a kid. PP took to it very quickly, and I just as quickly realized that I could spell, but had never learned to "read" sign language. So we spent a few minutes after the show circling the poster of the alphabet in ASL, and then an hour and a half in the grocery store getting 5 items, as PP acted mute, and patiently signed words to me over and over until I understood her.

So for the teachers reading this blog, and for the burgeoning teacher asleep in her bed, take inspiration from the story of Helen Keller, but remember that for her miracle to happen, she needed to meet Anne Sullivan! She was her companion for 50 years. Their friendship outlived Anne's married, and was the inspiration of many. Think of sign language as a language, and learn some! Read more of their stories. They are a great testament to Jung's idea: "The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemicals: they are both transformed!"

Who is your Helen? Who is your Anne? Today, be a student and a teacher. Who knows what might happen? As Helen is quoted as saying, "Life is a daring adventure or nothing. Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature." And, "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar." But also remember, as Anne is quoted, " Children require guidance and sympathy far more than instruction."

LANTERNS AT THE BOTANICAL GARDENS

La grue= The crane

In Chinese culture, cranes are symbols of good fortune and longevity. They are often depicted as celestial mounts for the Immortals and the Dead. The phoenix and the crane are the favorite birds of Chinese painters. The expression, " A crane among hens", refers to an individual who stands head and shoulders above the crowd, both literally and figuratively. 

It was a night in extreme contrast to the year before. The last time we went, it was also dusk, but the weather was unseasonably warm for September and the masses were incredible! This year, they had the forsight to sell tickets by a time slot, but by 6 pm it was pouring rain. We were well dressed, and had an umbrella and rainboots, but the paths were rivers and the tour was not easy, despite it being nearly deserted. Still, although I didn't take as many pictures, it was an incredible experience to see the sun set and the lanterns glow. The twinning of Shanghai and Montreal remains a great joy to me. My friend from Wu Xi said the stones are from her home town. The Japanese Garden has a twin too. Montreal and Hiroshima share that honor, and the story of the rejuvenation of that city was inspiring. I was able to share the story of Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes with Princess Pirate. She is Japan's Terry Fox, and the story came out in 1977, with Terry's Marathon of Hope in 1980. Both are legends to my generation, and, I hope, a continued inspiration to my daughter's.

Pumpkin decorating contest never fails to impress

Last day for the lotus seed moon cakes. I feel like I didn't miss the autumn festival after all!

The He Luo You was the centerpiece of the show this year. This creature was born in Inner Mongolia, in a tributary of the Yellow River, and has one head, 10 bodies and barks like a dog. It can turn into a bird, but is terrified, and hides, when it hears thunder. (Unless it is coming from the neighbouring Indigenous gardens!)

Rainbow phoenix, my spirit animal

LA DIPERIE WORKS OF ART

 S'more dip and skor bits

Piña Colada dip and coconut

FORTIES AND FAILING IT

My daughter came home from school today, upset. She had been working hard at a poster project, and her teacher criticized that it was too little in so much time. In 50 minutes she had drawn an oval and two hands. This is not uncommon, but having her teacher call her out on it was. She felt like a failure.
I did my best to re-frame the day. She admitted that it was a pretty great day otherwise. I told her I loved her, and that I had never seen her fail yet, and that the only way she would fail is to give up now. I asked her how she felt when I "failed" the triathlon, placing in the bottom 1% and she had to admit that she was proud.

But tonight, when she said she was ready for bed, I walked through the house to her bedroom and saw everything that I asked her to take care of every day done badly or not at all. Her clothes from tonight and this morning were on the ground. Her bookbag was stuffed with loose crushed papers. Her coat was on the floor instead of the empty hangar. Her shoes were knotted from when she removed them. So instead of being the mom that I wanted to be, I took every careless act as a personal insult, and I felt ashamed. Ashamed that I let others take advantage of me. Ashamed that I let her have playtime after school instead of doing chores, because I think she needs it, but maybe I'm not completely okay with. Ashamed that I can so carefully explain the simple rules I ask to be honoured over and over, and to be completely ignored. So I freaked out, and made her correct all these "failures" before she went to bed.

They say that the forties is when you know who you are, and have the confidence to be who you are. Some of my friends have things organized: menu planning, house routines, time to paint and run 10 k and something of value to teach others. I feel like I am constantly made aware of my failings, but I have never been more disorganized. I can't seem to set a routine and keep it, whether in menu planning, housework, work work. And instead of having an ally of 15 years and share stories of the same timeframe, I am gun shy, anxious, and way oversensitive to shame.

I guess I'll have to listen to my own advice, and try again tomorrow. Here's to hoping that in my fifties, I will finally feel comfortable in my own skin again, and, even before, not overreact so strongly to laundry on the floor, and next time, like the politician's advise, trust but verify.

MY GIRL STARTING "HIGH SCHOOL"

Wednesday morning, my princess pirate starts grade seven at a local high school. It's hard to believe, but it's been a while that this girl has been moving slowly towards teenagehood. That being said, this last week of summer has been a great reminder of how great she has been at childhood.

It's a fine line with an only child, not to treat them like the oldest child, and expect too much from them, nor to treat them like the last child, and be too easy on them. Sometimes I see that she has been spoiled, without the expectations that she should take care of everything shared, but have no others to share the responsibility with. This was intentional. As the oldest girl in my family, I was expected to help the most and take care of more than myself. But I was also told not to be so serious, as though I hadn't been trained to obedience and selfnessness that led me there. So letting my daughter not have all her responsibilities was intentional. Sometimes though, she reminds me too much of her dad, taking more than her share, and not being grateful, but instead feeling entitled. So I have to remind her of how her perspective is skewed, and how lucky she really is. And for the most part, she does see it.

So two days away from the start of school, after sitting attentively through the introduction session, and reading the agenda details, what do I find her doing when I get up, or finish the dishes, or call her for supper?

Making mud pies and birds nests from twigs and leaves and mud.
Playing in The Hundred Acre Woods with Pooh and Piglet, Tigger and Rabbit.
Feeding dolls and reading to them.
Sorting through books from her childhood, reading and organizing and weeding her bookshelf.
Swimming like a frog, dolphin, mermaid.
Planning cakes and cookies for an easybake oven.
Running through the sprinkler.

I don't know how she is going to react to high school, but I hope she finds windows to stay the beautiful child that she is. I hope her teachers allow her to use her imagination. I hope that she can apply her creativity to the tasks at hand, and put her enthusiasm into the projects that are assigned.

I have no doubt, though, that we will continue to need to protect her free time, so that she can sing and play as well as study and work. I look forward to this next adventure!

FEED THE LIFEGUARD WEEK AT THE BELUGA POOL

Cut out

Fashioned with love

Decorated with colorburst candy melts and sugar cookie balls

Sugar cookie projects: Belugas, Thank you Penguins and a Birthday cat!

The final product

Iconic winter penguins, rescued from the garbage and ready for snow!

HOW TO WRITE A BOOK REPORT

Homework Centre: How to Write a Book Report

Another great reference:



INTRODUCTION

Title
Publication information: Publisher, year, number of pages
Genre
1-2 sentence introduction to the book and your report

BODY

Give a brief description of the setting, point of view, characters.
Summarize the plot.
If you are writing a review, don't give all the plot details or give away the ending.
Don't try and summarize everything. Focus on the most significant or interesting topics.
Analysis and evaluation: Write your own opinions. Was it a good story? Was it well written? How did it make you feel? Did you find it believable? Would you recommend it to others?

CONCLUSION

Sum up the book and your report. What impression were you left with? What do you want to reader to know about the book?

HOW TO WRITE A BOOK

This gem of a book goes throught the basic creative process in a fun way for children and adults alike.

1.  GET  IDEAS

Read. Learn. Ask questions and look for the answers. Observe. Invent. Record details. Journal. Doodle.

2. BRAINSTORMING

Once you have an idea, start brainstorming. I like lists but the suggestion of an idea web has led me to a few inspiring pages. At the beginning, no idea is a bad idea. Don't  edit. Be creative. And don't forget to write them down!

3.  RESEARCH

Go to the library. Do a web search. Look in books, magazines, newspapers and encyclopedias. Ask around. Interview someone. Do something.  Listen to a podcast. Watch a video. TAKE NOTES! Photograph and sketch.

4. INVENT CHARACTERS

Be creative. Base it on someone or creat someone completely new. Make them seem real. Think about their TRAITS. Name them.

5. SETTING

WHERE AND WHEN

Think where your book could take place. Be creative! It may be inspired by the characters and where they usually reside, or maybe you will pick a place they don't usually live.

6. PLAN/BUILD your book. List what might be in your book and doodle. You can change anything at this point, but don't forget the things you think will be important. Think of the title. Consider the genre. Try different plans. 

6. STORYBOARD

This helps plan the sequence of events. Draw a picture in each square, like a  comic strip, and summarize the action.

In FICTION: It should include the PLOT, with a beginning, middle and end. Often the main character encounters a PROBLEM, and the story evolves with finding a SOLUTION.

In NON-FICTION: Write about the facts you found in research.

7. ROUGH SKETCHES

Begin with making the art for your book. Make simple line drawings of the characters and settings you plan to use.

8. TITLE

Find something that will make people want to read your book!

9. ROUGH DRAFT

Use your notes, lists and plans to write a first draft. Leave space for editing. Try to write quickly. Don't try and perfect at this stage. Have fun and experiment!

10. SHARE

Let a person or group look at your work. Keep an open mind, but don't change things unless you believe it makes your story better.

11. REVISE

Switch words around. Use lively language. Change general words for specific ones. Include interesting details. Brainstorm and research more if you need to.

12. EDIT

Fix your mistakes and finalize your story. Check your grammar and spelling.
Get someone to check your work too.

REFRESHING WATER INSPIRED BY PRINCESS PIRATE

I have a big batch of wild mint, and have been enjoying water on and off with mint. Sometimes, though, it is not enough.

So today Princess Pirate offered to make me a water she had concocted from the garden.

3 small leaves of oregano
2 large leaves of oregano
2 large leaves of mint

It was just perfect!