LES GRANDS BALLETS

 A Rattraper

Léonce et Lena

Don Quixote

Lady Chatterly’s Lover

In 2012, I took my first yearly subscription of the Ballet Corps that Montreal is so lucky to have access to. 

This is the comprehensive summary of those years as evidenced by playbills, tickets and annotations from a file several inches thick that need to be noted and recycled.

2012-13

Le Lac des Cygnes/Swan Lake

I brought my friend and neighbour Marie-Claude to this first show on Thursday March 8th, 2012 at 20h00. We sat in the Mezzanine B17 at Wilfred Pelletier auditorium at Place-des-Arts.  It was a beautiful ballet, and the graceful movements of the National Ukrainian Ballet really did evoke the movements of the swan’s wings (probably known to me more like the Canada Geese that I have much more experience watching). I loved the unchanged classic ballet, but I understood the sacrifice and unnecessary suffering that comes with young dancers on point, and always hoped that my subscription, that included modern dancing would fund an openness to do things differently, which I believe I saw over time. 

The ballet is a musical score by P. I. Tchaikovsky (1840-1893), and choreographed by Alexandre Gorski (after Marius Petipa 1818-1910 and Ivanov), and was artistically directed by a principal dancer, Denis Matvienko, with Oleksiy Balkan as guest conductor. Natalia Matsak was the principal dancer with Denis Nedak. Maria Levitska was the set and costume designer.

This is the explanation from the pamphlet that was eventually going to become obsolete:

CHOREOGRAPHIES OF SWAN LAKE

Until the 19 century, a ballet's choreography took precedence over its score. But in the latter half of that century, Tchaikovsky (1840-1893) and choreographer Marius Petipa (1818-1910) shattered this convention by irrevocably linking music and dance. Aware of what was happening in France, Tchaikovsky wrote much of Swan Lake in Paris under the influence of Léo Delibes' dramatic ballet Sylvia (1876). The subject of Swan Lake is derived from water mythology, very much in vogue at the time n Slavic nations. Odette, a princess transtormed into a swan personifies the unattainable woman and represents the transcendent love for which Tchaikovsky yearned. With Swan Lake, Sleeping Beauty and The Nutcracker, the composer virtually founded symphonic ballet. A masterpiece of orchestration, Swan Lake is structured around the leitmotif known as the "Swan's Theme."

Together with Giselle, Swan Lake is a monument of the classical repertoire, often considered the pinnacle of Romantic ballet. First choreographed by Julius Reisinger, it premiered at the Bolshoi Theatre in Moscow in 1877. But it was not until 1895 (after the death of Tchaikovsky, with the version by Marius Petipa and his assistant Lev Ivanov, presented at the Mariinsky Theatre in St Petersburg, that the work entered the annals of history. It marked the beginning of both the great Russian tradition and a myth that would inspire countless choreographers for well over a century.

Inspired by Petipa-Ivanov, the three-act version of the National Ballet of Ukraine, which features the happy rather than dramatic ending, was adapted by Alexander Gorsky, the first ballet master of the Bolshoi Imperial Theatre from 1902 to 1924. The sets were designed by Maria Levitska, chief stage designer of the Ukrainian National Opera.

The demanding role of Odette/Odile requires a balance between dramatic expression and technique; in Act Il, as Odile, the black swan and disguised evil rival of Odette, the dancer must execute 32 spectacular fouettés. It is a dual role of unmatched beauty, a combination of aesthetic and technical brilliance, dependent on a perfectly synchronized corps de ballet. Outdoing each other in precision and prowess, the dancers verge on perfection.

There is much to marvel at in this timeless work: the elegance and grace of Odette, the Swan Queen; the treachery of the sorceress Odile; the love of the deceived prince expressed in a technically flawless performance; the cascade of dazzling ballerínas, perfectly aligned in their diaphanous tutus; the ethereal arm movements of the swans; the music by Tchaikovsky charged with dramatic and emotional tension...

Pure enchantment.

Reinterpretations and legacy of Swan Lake

The Petipa-Ivanov version spawned a European tradition of Swan Lake, with countless reinterpretations and pertormances Choreographers were inspired to offer their own readings of the myth; the ending was alternately happy or tragic, and the prominence of the secondary characters varied. By the 1940s, the complete ballet was regularly produced in Europe. Vladimir Bourmeister's version was staged at the Opéra de Paris in 1960.

In 1976, for the Hamburg Ballet, John Neumeier interpolated the story of Ludwig I of Bavaria into the Swan Lake plot. Rudolf Nureyev's version, staged at the Opéra de Paris in 1984, was psychoanalytic in nature, with Siegfried assuming a predominant role. Mats Ek, for the Cullberg Ballet in 1987, moved away from the original myth with a contemporary drama and bold musical approach in which the swans were played by dancers of both sexes, bald and barefoot. Matthew Bourne's Swan Lake of 1995 was transposed to the British royal court of 1950-1960, and featured a male swan. The female corps de ballet was replaced by a menacing male cast.

It’s a three act ballet with the following synopsis from the playbill:

Act l

The local noblemen have gathered together for a hunt in celebration of Prince Siegfried's 21st birthday. But the guests' amusements do not please the young man, who is more attracted by the beauty and grandeur of the world. In quest of pure souls, as pure as nature itself, he longs to escape from the petty intrigues of the court. When he spots a group of peasants, he approaches them.

His mother, the Sovereign Princess, arrives at the celebration, accompanied by ladies of the court.

Astonished at Siegfried's attraction to common-ers, she scolds him severely, insisting that he return to his noble guests. The Prince must choose his bride at tomorrow's ball. Left alone, Siegfried is absorbed in thought. He is not in love, and it is difficult for him to imagine himself engaged to a woman he does not know.

A flock of swans flies overhead, towards the secret lake. The young Prince senses somehow that they are in fact young women who have been transformed into white swans. He is irresistibly drawn to the legendary lake and to discovering its secrets. And he is prepared to surmount any obstacles to do so.

Act Il

A moonlit night. The realm of von Rothbard is imbued with a mysterious light. The evil magician has a premonition of danger: a stranger has entered his realm. Does this stranger not realize that anyone encroaching upon his territory risks losing his life?

With an imperious gesture, von Rothbard forces the defenceless swans down to earth. Siegfried appears. An extraordinarily beautiful woman stands before him, surrounded by her charming companions. She is Odette, the Swan Queen. The presence of a stranger frightens her companions.

But Siegfried gains the women's confidence: he has come with a pure heart and good intentions, and he inspires them with the hope of being released from the spell. The Swan Queen recounts that once upon a time, they were transformed into swans by the evil sorcerer von Rothbard. Only at night, by the lake, are they able to turn back into women. The spell can only be broken if someone falls in love with Odette, someone who has never been in love before. Siegfried, as if on cue, falls immediately and irretrievably in love with her. He pledges his undying love, and vows to rescue the women from the evil magician. At dawn, Odette bids farewell to the Prince. Von Rothbard's shadow foretells the many ordeals in store for Siegfried.

Act III

A ball is held at the castle. The guests respectfully bow when the Sovereign Princess and Siegfried arrive. Charming young women, one after the other, parade by the young man and his mother.

But none of them can touch the Prince's heart, as his affections lie with Odette. The heralds announce the arrival of some unexpected guests.

Von Rothbard, disguised as a noble knight, enters the hall with his daughter Odile, who looks ven much like Odette. The young Siegtried, thinking that she is his beloved, falls into the trap. The Prince's tutor, who senses danger, attempts to warn the young man, but Siegfried, under the spell of the sorcerer and blinded by Odile's beauty, offers his hand to her. Von Rothbard hastens to join the couple in marriage. As the Prince pledges his love to Odile, Odette's silhouette appears in a castle window. Siegfried realizes his mistake. He runs out of the hall in despair, to the dismay of all the guests.

By the shore of the lake, the swans anxiously await the return of Odette. With great emotion, she recounts Siegfried's inadvertent treachery. The women are filled with despair: now, nothing can break the evil spell. Siegfried appears, He implores Odette to forgive him. Although she believes wholeheartedly in his sincerity, she feels that nothing can change their unhappy fate: Odette and the women will die, and Siegfried will marry Odile. The Prince is prepared to atone for his mistake at the cost of his own life. He challenges von Rothbard to a duel.

Exhausted in the unequal struggle that follows, the Young man gathers his final ounce of strength to snatch the crown, the source of von Rothbard's power and witchcraft, from the sorcerer's head. The Sky is pierced by lightning bolts. The evil sorcerer dies. The spell has been broken, and Odette holds out her hand to her true love and saviour.

GRIEVING

 I haven’t been moved to tears in a while, but it happened to me today after fighting against a system that I know well, but even still, I had to talk to three different people and insist on the third person who was the supervisor in order to get an appointment that I was patronizing by the person that I could only have one problem to discuss. She was the best of them, having introduced herself (although I had to ask twice), and her merit was mostly in not cutting off the conversation and seeing reason to finally book an appointment instead of the circles of hell I had already travelled (online, by phone) previously to know that my attachment to this doctor who was not practicing and now moving (but had not yet transferred me, the patient). 

I woke up feeling surprised by the sensation of being on the positive side of emotions. I was even feeling content.

I hung up with confirmation of an appointment and bloodwork requested last November that I hadn’t been able to print out in the 24hours before it disappeared and I forgot about.

The inbox was, in order, a confirmation of the clinic appointment (this is a good system not often seen in hospital), the asked for request for labs, and my city’s hydro bill.

In my lap, at the time that the 43 minute wait for the appointment request, was a pile of ballet playbills in order of date with tickets that had been previously annotated with the company that I invited. I realized that I was having trouble recycling them because I the company that I kept no longer cared to accompany me. Mostly, I was sad that the days with my daughter appreciating the ballet with me were over many years ago.

All of these things aggrieved me, but the most innocent of them all raised the most recent grief. My neighbour, Lillian, died suddenly, and too soon, at the age of 88. The days that preceded her death were busy ones, full of preparation for her move closer to her daughter. She had things organized for the new owners with information from the last 30 years in an accordion folder for them. Every day we went to the mailbox to get the last remaining detail. The water tax couldn’t be confirmed, and she would have loved to have that bill in hand to close the deal.

So today I grieve a great lady, a wonderful friend, and terrible losses. RIP.

May I find a peace with my life lived and give myself what I need now instead of worrying about the future. 

May I find peace with the possibility that the silence of friends and my precious Princess Pirate is not intentional, and that I am not deserving this imposed isolation, but only meant to bear it, and move forward. 

May I remember those around me that make my life larger and better in community, and enjoy the silence and reflection and freedom within my aloneness. It is not all lonely, and even when it is, my grief reminds me a good life lived before.

SLOW UNPRODUCTIVITY

It has been ten months since I last worked in the health care system, and I am still being told that I am on the resting stage. It is taking so long and the likelihood of me returning to the work that was my passion for over twenty-five years is extremely unlikely. I am not even sure how a return to work anywhere would be possible, honestly, but I am trying to be patient and find myself wandering around aimlessly which is actually putting my home life back together slowly. Very slowly!

My official leave ends at the end of this month (August 31st, actually, but that was a mistake!) and if I imagine returning to work in less than 3 weeks, I have not done enough. I can panic so easily, and avoid the tasks that most need doing. I see the thankless jobs done at customer service desks in grocery stores and wonder how I would even do that without cracking! 

But as long as I have, and in the moments in between when I have to return to useful work, I will enjoy finishing one thing at a time, as it comes. I will enjoy that I can change tasks so that I can do something else even if it's not the most pressing. I will enjoy dreaming of paint colours and inventing things from the things in my house. I will read books and draw and mend and write. I will be silent alone, and enjoy the company of others. I will reach out when it might be inconvenient and have answers for others that they might not want to hear, but I will be okay with allowing myself to do what I feel is best for me. I will negotiate without imploding in childlike helplessness. I will not accept when others cannot meet me where I want them to be, and I will be for myself what I need anyways. I will be open to the love and care of others and learn to trust and be generous again. I will not keep a record of wrongs or add up in a zero sum way. I will believe in growth that is synergistic and not selfish. I will accept responsibility but not be held liable for things that were not under my human control. I will hope for others to love me, and I will learn to love with more acceptance, and continue to improve the way I recognize and communicate my needs. 

I will be happy to serve others as long as I am meeting my own needs first. I hope I can get to the recovery phase soon, but I am grateful to rest a little longer.

SLEEP HYGIENE WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM JAPAN

The idea of a good sleep is based on the premise that your body can rest best when it feels safe.

Here are a few suggestions:

Ofuro (hot bath) T-1.5 hours

Yoruno Sanpo (10-20 minute walk after dinner)

Yomu Jikan (Read a physical book) even 6 minutes reduces stress significantly

Kansha (gratitude)

Early dinner T-3 hours

Spend the evening preparing for bed

Dim light T-2 hours

Digital sunset T-1 hour

Music

Tea

To put it all together, for a 10:30 pm bedtime:

Finish eating by 7:30

Go for a slow walk afterwards, focusing on the things you are grateful for from the day.

Set alarms and get ready for the next day. 

Play calm music and turn down light, and silence alarms, at least by 9:30

Have a bath and/or have a tea

Read for at least a few minutes, even in bed.

MOVIE REVIEW: THE ODYSSEY

 Although the 70 mm IMAX theatres were sold out for weeks downtown, we had our pick of seats in the suburbs, and went to a regular theater to see the show with my  half-Greek boyfriend and his teen kids. 

It was as epic as I could have hoped, and a little safer than I expected, prepared as I was from the parent guide of IMDB for severe violence that was to be expected in a Greek myth. 

I was not aware that the screenplay had been written by Christopher Nolan, whom I knew had directed the film. Although Odysseus was often narrator, most of the movie was a good balance of show, don’t tell. It felt safer to watch as a female than expected, with Calypso prompting Odysseus to tell his story from the unreliable narrator POV that was created for the movie as opposed, and Penelope mostly protected by a decorative sliding door from the rowdy crowds of greedy suitors being kept next door. 

The movie was gripping, and flowed easily until maybe the last half hour of the 170 minutes. I think the battle scenes and how many suitors tried to string the bow could been cut down by at least 20 minutes to the films benefit.

The Trojan horse was beautiful craftsmanship and the exterior and interior scenes interesting, if not a little contrived. The scene with Hades was a little disappointing but Athena was often present and the results of the gods Poseidon and Zeus where evident, with the ship in weather scenes well done, as was the taking of Troy.

All in all, if the story with all is violence is known, I think it was an excellent movie with appropriately epic proportions.

THE BANALITY OF EVIL

 “Evil comes from a failure to think. It defies thought for as soon as thought tries to engage itself with evil and examine the premises and principles from which it originates, it is frustrated because it finds nothing there. That is the banality of evil.”

― Hannah Arendt, Eichmann in Jerusalem: A Report on the Banality of Evil

REMEDIES TO GLUCOSE INTOLERANCE

Vegetable starter (soup, salad, crudites), before carbs

Walk 10 minutes post prandial

Build a savory breakfast around protein (cortisol rises to wake us with glucose release)

Dress your carbs (with something else)

Only eat sweets as dessert, on a full stomach

Snack on savory

Sleep like your glucose depends on it (sleep deprivation in young health subjects over 6 nights raised glucose intolerance)

Lift something heavy twice week (muscles are a major glucose storage as glycogen)

Treat all sugar is sugar. (There are no healthy sugars) Avoid the "health halo"

HIGH ROI FOR HEALTH

Trade fat for muscle (strength train)

Focus on eating protein throughout the day (30g 4 x per day) 

Move daily (short, frequent, walk after meals, avoid being sedentary)

HITS

Reduce or eliminate ETOH

Prioritize sleep (avoid late ETOH, caffeine, screen time, large/late meal and make bedtime routine and consider mind dump of thoughts

Dr Rachel Felber

RUNNER'S FIVE MUSCLE GROUPS TO STRETCH

Hamstrings

Hip flexors

Quadriceps

Calves

Iliotibial band

-Scott Jurek

SCOTT JUREK'S LENTIL-MUSHROOM BURGERS

1 cup dried green lentils
2 1/4 cups water
1 tsp dried parsley                        
1/4 tsp black pepper
1 garlic minced cloves
1/4 cups finely chopped onion 

3/4 cup finely chopped walnuts

2 cups fine bread crumbs
1/2 cup ground flax seed

1 cup finely chopped onion 

2 garlic mince cloves
3 cups (454 g) finely chopped mushrooms
1 1/2 c spinach
2 T cooking oil
3 T balsamic vinegar
2 T Dijon mustard
2 T nutritional yeast
1 tsp salt
1/2 tsp black pepper
1/2 tsp paprika

In a small pot, bring the lentils, water, parsley, 1 garlic clove, and 1/4 cup onion to a boil. Rduce heat and simmer, partially covered, for 35-40 minutes, until the water is absorbed and the lentils are soft.

Combine walnuts, bread crumbs, and flax seed in a bowl. Add the nutritional yeast, salt, pepper, and paprika and mix well.

Sauté the remaining onion, remaining garlic (2 cloves), mushrooms, and spinach greens in oil for 8-10 minutes, then set aside. Remove the lentils from heat, add the vinegar and mustard, and mash with a potato masher to a thick paste. 

Combine lentils, sautéed veggies, and bread crumb mixtures, and mix well. Cool in the refrigerator for 15 to 30 minutes more. 

Press into with 1/3 cup to form burger patties and press into pan. Lightly fry in a skillet until lightly browned and crisp, 3-5 minutes on each side. 

Makes 12. 

Combine  From Eat and Run

PERFECT ROYAL ICING

CRAFTSY Stephanie

Wilton icing recipe: 
Powdered sugar - sift
Meringue powder

Whisk together

Add vanilla.

Add water 1 T at a time in mixer. (Don't add too much!)

Use a spatula to make sure the dry bits are incorporated.

Once wet but thick, whip for 4 minutes on high.

Should look dry and stiff when finished.

Use a spray bottle to water down your icing.

5 consistencies

1. Stiff outline - lettering and outlines - can flatten with spoon, but stiff (doesn't relax)

2. Loose outline- outline of cookies

3. Stiff flooding - small areas - relaxes slightly from peak

4. Medium flooding - navigates around the small shapes done with stiff icing - useful for speed

5. Smooth flooding - 
Adjusting consistencies

BENJAMIN FRANKLIN ADVICE ON LIFE

 " Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing."

RULE OF 72

 Divide 72 by your annual interest rate to find the double time in years.

72/7 = 10.3 years

THINGS I WOULD TELL YOU IF YOU HAD THE BANDWIDTH TO LISTEN

Last night I picked up my boyfriend at the train station. It was predictably late, but it gave me the time to shower his dog (that was my shower too, and that was a new adventure!) and wash his collar so that he smelled good again. 

I also found out last night that today was the bulk pickup, and I had my previous oven blocking the corner of my kitchen since I paid for the price of movers and got his dad’s fridge and stove in good used condition. I thought about keeping it in the shed for backup, but realized I didn’t have the space. I dragged it through the house on my own when I realized that I was ready to let it go. It got stuck at the front door with corrugated threshold, and I didn’t have enough strength alone to overcome it, so I called for help, and Princess Pirate helped me get it out of the house on the front step. 

I knew that the conference that BF was working at was going to wipe him out, and that the day before that ended in a late night did not set him up for anything but being tired. When we got home, he saw the stove, and asked, « So we have to deal with that tonight? ». I guess I didn’t make myself clear when I gave both options. Did I say yes, but we could do it before 7 in the morning? I was pretty sure that if I didn't want to do it now, I definitely wouldn't want to do it that early in the morning. I was also sure that I needed it out of my kitchen, because there was no room for it and it had already been blocking cupboards for a few days. 

I might assume that I wasn't brave enough to take the fallout of insisting, but I think it was a very rational choice given that I wanted to do it and he did not, so I would do it alone, so he went off to bed while I wrestled the stove out of the kitchen.

It wasn't too bad getting through the house but getting through the double doors with a small entrance was tough once I hit the metal doorstop. Fortunately, I met PP's boyfriend who was blocked by my endeavor and therefore required to help if he wanted to get in! In short order, he helped me lift it up and out, down the steps. I was able to walk it pretty easily to the curb after that.

By morning it was gone, and when my BF noticed, he asked why I didn't ask him to help. I treated it as a rhetorical question, but I knew that it was what I needed to do to show up for myself. 

RETURN TO THE GASPÉ

During the 2020 pandemic, Princess Pirate and I went on a road trip for three weeks, and part of it was up and around the Gaspé peninsula. Since then, I have always wanted to return to the Park called Forillon, specifically to stay in a spaceship like lodging called the Oasis with the closest view of the pebble beach that you can find in the northern section called des Rosiers.

The design of this accommodation had a few problems, but I was thrilled to be inside one and peek out over the trail where I had seen porcupines graze and found moose footsteps on our walk out to the lighthouse and out on to the beach, to the escarpment that bookmarked the view with an escarpment, and to the expanse of the water that was at the verge of the St. Lawrence seaway 

I love hearing the waves move the flat rocks up the shore into a homogeneous piles that make for a stone skippers endless supply. The next section of rocks were less flat and more heterogenous in colour and form. Then comes the sand and tidal pools that only appear as the tide

AT THE UN-NATIONAL MONUMENT ALONG THE CANADIAN BORDER

 By poet William Stanford

This is the field where the battle did not happen

Where the unknown soldier did not die.

This is the filed where grass joined hands

Where no monument stands

And the only heroic thing is the sky.

Birds fly here without any sound

Unfolding their wings across the open

No people killed

Or were killed

On this ground

Hallowed by neglect and an air so tame

That people celebrate it by forgetting its name.

GALOIS THEORY WRITTEN UNDER PRESSURE OF DUEL

The Story of Mathematics by Richard Mankiewicz

Romantic enthusiast

From 37,000 year old calendar stick made from notched bone to 20 year old Evarist Galois who spent the night before his death in a duel writing down the essentials of his theory (a key component in modern algebra), occasionally pausing to write in the margins “I have no time!”

MARTHA MARTIN

O Rugged Land of Gold

 1953 Memoir detailing her survival as a pregnant, injured woman abandoned on a remote Alaskan island during winter

THE GREAT ESCAPE

 Book and 1963 movie with Steve McQueen

Inspired by US airman John Dortch Lewis

Flew missions in a FABRIC-COVERED Hawker Hurricane with the RCAF

Wounded over France but crash landed in Britain.

Shot down over North Africa and evaded German troops in the desert for 2 weeks before capture

Caught 3 times before breaking free on the 4th try in a prison camp with a group of allied troops

Died in N. Carolina with pancreatic cancer and emphysema

GATORADE INSPIRATION

 Invented for U of Florida football

“What will you do?

Will you give into it or will you fight through it?

Will you fear it or embrace it?

Will you hold back or will you hold nothing back?

Is it in you?”

SELF-ESTEEM

 Dr. Michael Sheehan (The Self Esteem Game)

”Self esteem is present when there is little discrepancy between a person’s ideal and actual self.”

GAME THEORY?

 Jean Paul Sartre

“Only in games is man free, because only in games does he understand what is going on.”

Joe Morris in The Banker

"Even a rigged game's fun to play."

MARRIAGE

 17th century Bishop Jeremy Taylor

“Marriage has less beauty but more safety than a single life. It’s full of sorrows and full of joy. It lies under more burdens but it is supported by all of the strengths of love, and those burdens are delightful.”

MISO SOUP

2 tsp dashi (bonito powder or other stock concentrate)
3 T miso paste

8 oz tofu

3 green onions, sliced

4 c water

BIRTHDAY DIP DEVOURED

Layer from bottom:

Softened cream cheese (consider whipped with herbs) with Italian seasoning sprinkle on top

Hummus

Chopped cucumber, tomato, red onion, red and green pepper

Crumbed feta

Serve with sturdy cracker (Walmart had Kellogg’s Townhouse Pita all dressed bagel triangles that were perfect)

 Credit: Brittany!

HAPPINESS

I am having trouble remembering what happiness feels like, so I asked a good friend at lunch today to remind me. She did a beautiful job creating a visual for me with heart shaped memories in a magical library of sorts à la J. K. Rowling. Then, being the teacher that she is to her core, she gave me a homework assignment: 

What happiness feels like with the 5 senses. 

Sight. Smell. Hearing. Taste. Touch.

This is what I came up with :

Happiness is beauty. Happiness is order. Happiness is surprise. Happiness is loved ones. Happiness is a good story. Happiness is another language. Happiness is a library full of books. Happiness is my favourite places empty. Happiness is my favourite places being enjoyed, full of people . Happiness is seeing a friend in person. Happiness is art. Happiness is laughter. Happiness is belonging. Happiness is generosity. Happiness is cleverness. Happiness is innocence. Happiness is wisdom. Happiness is health. Happiness is purpose in life. Happiness is movement. Happiness is loving and being loved. Happiness is being understood and being able to understand.

Happiness looks like nature. It looks like the giant granite rocks erratically left in forests and on mountains as the ice age moved on. It’s the green ferns on a backdrop of rust coloured ground from fallen pine needles that feel soft but durable when walked on. It’s the expanse of water at the edges of rivers, lakes and oceans. It’s a glowing pink sunset turning tangerine and lemon as the colours reflect off the ceiling of clouds before disappearing with the sunlight into the grayscale of dusk. It’s a stranger’s baby who smiles at you while their parents are busy across the room. It’s the beauty of paintings in an exhibit you wanted to see.  It’s the geometry of a repeating shapes in a Chinese garden. It’s the grandeur of an art deco building lobby. It’s the awe of stepping into a church nave. It’s the variety of stone used in an expensive building. It’s the decor set in the lobby of a hotel. It’s the seasonal changes in the store front window. It’s the carefully put together outfit of the fashion conscious. It’s the inspirational mishmash of a vision board. It’s the aesthetic genius of a new book cover. It’s the twinkle lights that light up the living room when the sun has set.

Happiness smells like baking bread, cinnamon buns, and spun cotton candy. Happiness smells like pumpkin spice coffee in the fall. It’s the neighbour cooking curry. It’s frying garlic, onions and mushrooms when my boyfriend is making supper. It’s fried eggs and toast when my daughter is making breakfast. It’s roasted almonds, vegetables, chicken, peanuts.Happiness smells like a pesto on a hike above the Italian coast. It smells like melted butter on popcorn in a theatre. It smells like cologne in the air. Happiness smells like the rotting leaves in the forest on a cool day. It’s fresh air instead of pollution. It’s air freshener after a good bowel movement. It’s the smell of lilacs in the spring. It’s the smell of sage on a prairie wind. 

Happiness sounds like a purring kitten. It sounds like a playground full of childrens’ voices. It sounds like a baby’s laugh. It’s the eruption of laughter with a friend who knows you from high school. It’s the sound of a loved one opening the door to come home. It’s the sound of teasing from brothers. It’s the cold sound of crunching white snow on a sunny winter day. It’s the swishing sound of leaves as you kick your feet through piles of autumn leaves just like you remember doing as a kid. It’s the crashing waves on the seashore as you walk on the beach. It’s the sound of trickling water that turns into a waterfall as you get closer and then fades away as you get further away. It’s the quiet of your living room on a day when you get to be at home. It’s the sound of the wind whipping around the house in a storm when you are safe and warm. It’s the sound of a catchy song that plays on a good quality speaker. It’s the sound of your favourite band in a concert of a lifetime. It’s the softness of a quilt full of memories.

Happiness tastes like maple syrup poured cold over snow. It tastes like fresh berries in the summer that you picked yourself. It tastes like the richness of a hundred different cheeses on your first visit to France. It tastes like a tomato still warm from the garden. It tastes like buttered corn at a family reunion. It’s a salty pretzel served warm in Central Park. Happiness tastes like a jammy red Cabernet, with a hint of cocoa and vanilla. It tastes like the first bite of your lunch when you are sitting at the mountain summit. It tastes like the richness of a french onion soup covered in melted cheese after downhill skiing for the day. It tastes like an artisanal chocolate that melts on your tongue into flavours that burst with interest and cause you to enjoy the discovery that the chocolate maker described to you in detail with glee. It’s a meal shared with family and savoured over conversation with friends.

Happiness is a cozy room full of people I love and who love me. It feels like the embrace of a loving hug. It’s a kid snuggling up close to you on the couch while you both read a book. It’s the feeling of relaxation that happens with a good massage. It’s the stroke of a loving hand. It’s the squeeze of a partner’s strong grip holding hands. It’s the smooth feel of silk, the rich feel of velvet, the rough tongue of a cat licking you in acceptance, the textured feel of a tree trunk, the cool feel of grass lying spread eagle on a perfect summer day. It’s the softness of your grandmother’s hands. It’s the rocking of a hammock on a warm lazy day. It’s the coldness on your toes that you dip in water off a dock. It’s the squishing of wet sand walking barefoot on the beach.

Happiness is finding a rare flower that only lives for one day. It is also enjoying a plant that you see every day. Happiness is food in season, and from your back yard, and found fresh at the farmer’s market. It is food shared from a friend’s garden. It’s food made by a friend and eaten in good company. It’s losing track of time trying to paint a picture. It’s the feeling after yoga class, limber and relaxed. It’s the euphoria of stopping when you finish a great run. It’s when you get to the top of a mountain and your breath is taken away by the view just as you are starting to catch it again from the climb.

Happiness is as much an act of the mind as it is a feeling. I can be happy without feeling happy, but I do like to feel happy when I believe I am happy. Happiness is hope for a better day because I remember the happiness that I have already known.

ADVENTURES LEAVING SLC

I thought I had calculated exact change, but when I checked while waiting at the side of steeply sloped road for the bus, I couldn’t find it. Ion’t know what happened to the one dollar bill that I thought I had saved, but I had to use a $5 bill. The fee is only $2.50, but since I was starting my business trip in the boonies and I could only pay cash. (I couldn’t buy alcohol at a state liquor store or bus/tram tickets on the app being something other than a US citizen!). I get on the bus and I end up texting my boyfriend in this emotionally intense conversation and miss my stop. I only realize when I see that  we are going OVER an highway overpass instead of being downtown!

I run to the driver which is not easy with a roller suitcase at highway speeds, and she confirms that I have gone to far. I ask what to do and she says get off and go across the street to head back. This morning I was more concerned about cutting into my sleep when I left for the bus this morning because there is no customs to clear, so I only gave myself 2.5 hours from door to gate. I am beginning to panic a little, feeling like I might have been a little cocky and lazy as the route by bus is slow already, and the detour wasn’t at all in the plans. I see the bus coming and run across the street with my roller bag hopping, only to see no bus stop. A helpful man told me I had to cross another part of the intersection, and instead of saying thank you, the only word I uttered was, Fuck! 

I am now running, jay RUNNING across the street to try and stay ahead of the bus that is just abreast of me at the red light, hoping that it will be enough for him to stop. I manage to get across safely before he can pull forward but I don’t see the sign. I run, and just as he is pulling up, I get to it. It was hard to see behind the foliage of a tree. I get on with a total relief, huffing and puffing,and take out the paper transfer that I haven’t seen since I lived in Regina,and the driver says, it’s not validated! 

Anyways, he tells me how it should be but lets me on and I watch like a hawk out the window as my BF tries to video call and text. I don’t dare answer even though I have regrettably left him totally hanging and he might think that I am stonewalling, but I can’t miss the junction where the tram to the airport starts. I get off, and I call immediately to finish the conversation. I can do nothing but wait. 

The tram comes. It’s not fast but it’s reliable. I get off at the airport. It’s 8:45 and I have to 9:15 to get my bag checked. The place is big, and I find the check-in. It’s super easy with almost no wait, and again, I take a deep breath and sigh with relief. The TSA is automated and it’s so fast that I get through painlessly (there were a LOT of people waiting) and am waiting for my bags, only to realize that I had been the slow part, and they were already at the end where I wasn’t looking! 

I get to the gate at 9 and go to find some food, only to realize that I didn’t have my wallet to pay! So now it’s 9:15 and I ask the poor busy cashier what to do. He sends me to information, and I find two big signs that are, in my defence, labelled as information too, only to realize that I missed the human in the middle. I use his table to empty everything out from my bag to double check that I didn’t misplace my wallet (because how many times has that happened that I think it’s lost but it’s there somewhere). I don’t find it with a sinking feeling, because now I am faced with the problem of looking for my wallet or making my flight.

Brad was the helpful man at the information podium, and he calls the TSA and describes the wallet.  I remember two things: I had my wallet until I used my passport at the ID station to get into security and then I put it away, and when I picked up my backpack from the screening it was wide open. Fortunately I packed up by habit dividing my valuables so that only $26 USD were at stake with the rest stowed at the bottom of my backpack, and I had my passport. Brad suggests I could back to the TSA but now it’s less than 30 minutes before takeoff and there is quite a distance back. I lock my visa that I lost, mourned my health ID that were going to be a pain to replace, but I leave him with regret and  head off  to my gate.

He heads off to TSA for me and says he’ll text either way. I am the last group so it’s 20 minutes later. I am just about to join the line that is ending, when here comes Brad huffing and puffing with my wallet triumphantly upraised in his hand! I ask if I can hug him, and I squeeze him like he saved my life and tell him he’s my hero while I hustle to be the last person to board the plane, elated!

« 7 LAYER DIP »

9x13

BOTTOM

1 can of refried beans 546mL with 1/2 t garlic powder, 2 t chili, 1t cumin or taco seasoning

4 avocados mashed with 1T lime juice

1 c sour cream

3/4 c salsa

1c shredded orange cheddar

Chopped green onion and tomato 

Opt cilantro 

TOP

Serve with tortilla chips

HALIFAX FOOD

April 2012 found me in Halifax for the CCFP exams with a stipend instead of a cost

Here were the food options that I made my list:

Fid slow food Paris trained lunch and breakfast 902-422-9162 the courtyard 1569 dresden row
Chives canadian bistro 1537 barring ton st
Jane's on the common
Wooden monkey
Vegetarian heartwood bakery and cafe 11-2000
Two if by sea 1869 upper water st 7:30 to 6 best cafe 2011
Halifax seaport farmers market waterfront pier 20 tues to fri 1-5pm

WEBKINZ WORLD

 Pinky Purple

FAIRMONT CHATEAU LAURIER

1 Rideau Street

Booking 2 nights 1 room Friday 25 OCT 2013 15:00 - Sunday 27 OCT 2013 noon

1 double room with 2 double beds - non-refundable

CAD 334

Special Requests: preference to overlook river or parliament buildings, prefer higher floor, preer quiet area away from elevator

Public parking CAD 26/day Private CAD 35/day

HERMAN

He was as precious to males as he was to females. 

He wasn't a He-man. He wasn't She-man. He was to her as he was to a man. 

He was Herman!

129 TABS

 My tapestry has many unknotted threads. It's overdue to clear my cache.

The Lifecycle of an Almond

After a trip to California, where there were groves of trees that provide so much of our food even this far away that were growing in near desert conditions. This article gives the perspective of this that took me a drive through the San Joaquin Valley to realize.

Villa Diodati

Did you know that the stories Frankenstein and Vampyre were both created in a villa in Switzerland in 1816, the year that was called "the year without summer". This was due to the volcanic eruption called Mount Tambora in Indonesia the year before. Lord Byron rented the villa, and was visited by friends that included Percy Shelley and Mary Godwin(to be Shelley).

Muskellunge

I saw this fish on a sunny day paddle boarding along the St. Laurence "Lac St Louis". It was a thrill compounded by seeing a Kingfisher on the same trip, and the fact that I didn't fall down (or stand up!)

Claude Theberge

I have spend many hours exploring the art and architecture of the metro system, and I was surprised to see a concrete design in the De L'Eglise station attributed this artist I knew well from pop art that I first saw with vibrant colours raincoats and umbrellas, mostly from Quebec City.

Jordi Bonet

Similarly, this artist has done remarkable artwork for the metro.  In this case, his Citius, Altius, Fortius (Faster, Higher, Stronger) mural in the mezzanine of Pie IX metro. This is the motto of the Olympic Games adopted by Pierre de Coubertin since its renaissance in 1894.

I found him in the foyer of Place des Arts during an entracte at Les Grands Ballets. I suspect I have seen his work on doors somehere in a church.

Notably, his biography notes that he was born in Barcelona, and died where he had set up his studio in St. Hilaire on Christmas Day.

Micheline Beauchemin

This female textile artist has a piece along the windows of the Place des Arts called Curtain of Light. 

Telfair Museum

My one foray into Georgia was a day trip to Savannah from Hilton Head. There are many highlights including this museum tour, and I love that I can visit from afar and relieve the architecture tours of the Jepson Center and the Owens-Thomas House and Slave Quarter's.

Escape room puzzle ideas

Clue in a balloon

Oil on glass

Bold letters in a chocolate box menu

Invisible ink - lemon juice, oil on glass

Padlock a pair of scissors

Set a broken clock or watch as a combination clue

Cypher on popsicle sticks

Lockets

Photoshop a framed picture

Write in a foreign language

Craft a cryptex with styrofoam cups

Bilingual law language

Massey Lectures to listen to on Ideas

Norman Borlaug and the Green Revolution

Nobel Peace Prize, credited with saving over a billion people from starvation

The Difference between dilly dally and lollygagging

Dilly dally, from "dallier" in French, "to amuse oneself slowly". Today it refers timewasting and indulgent. The pair of words doubles the effect, called reduplication.

Lollygagging, from lally.  Also timewasting, but usually describes the way two people in love would act around each other, sometimes referring to bawdy public behavior between couples

The Evolution of the Nutcracker Ballet

Achalandé English bustling (full of people) or well-stocked (store)

Antidote writing assistance software - get hi

Stonewall Riots 1969, Greenwich Village bar, mafia run, haven for LGBTQ, police raid leads to mob, no injuries, 1970 First Gay Pride parade begins from Stonewall

Raëlism Rael was a French born self-proclaimed profit, announcing the future arrival of extraterrestrials called Elohim. A connection to Quebec of this Swiss based "UFO" cult was a branch that moved near Valcourt in 1992, with a museum opened called UFOland (closed as financially unviable). A female "secret society" formed called the Order of Raël's angels (1998). A claim was made that the first human clone, named Eve, announced by Rael's partner and successor Bousselier in 2002. In 2004, Raël's Girls were the subject of Playboy issue.

Who By Fire Leonard Cohen song (spanish guitar and poetic paradoxes), Who shall I say is calling?

W. H. Auden 

Herman Melville (quoted by Louise Penny's Gamache in Still Life)

Evil is unspectacular and always human

And shares our bed and eats at our own table.

CEGEP program (technique de bioécologie) I hoped for my budding naturalist

McGill's Ciphers of The Times (Victorian Agony Column Game)

Mayan Number to Decimal/Arabic converter

Lectin - found in food, carbohydrate-binding proteins

Starling murmurations

Governing Security: The Hidden Origins of American Security Agencies, by Yolanda and Alberto's son, f, now a scholar and leader

English words of Arabic origins T-Z

E la verita - sung with a dementia patient and her daughters

Pluvio restaurant - nice food with big prices, diminished by the company who was rude and irritable and made a scene

Nanaimo Bars recipe

BOOK REPORT: BIG MAGIC

 This is one of the most inspirational books I have read in a long time. I have enjoyed reading Elizabeth Gilbert on a few occasions, but this nonfiction book about « Creative Living Beyond Fear » is my favourite.

I was like many others,  being introduced to the author with her autobiographical hit « Eat, Pray, Love », which was a travelogue as much as a good story made into a great movie. 

After that, I read another autobiographical nonfiction called Committed, which explained her complicated international monogamous status, and gave an even more intimate look at her personal life.

Next, I read her fiction « The Signature of All Things » , which was a opus that was both beautiful in its details and a little strange (some might find it sacrilegious or too sexual).

« The City of Lost Girls » was a disappointment to me, in the vein of fictitious hyperbole that I disliked in « The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugh ». Set in New York, I found her characters unemotional and vapid.

16 years ago, Ms. Gilbert gave a TED talk about creativity that I found inspiring. Now, reading her treatise on creativity, I am even more inspired! 

Very early on, her stories allow the skeptic in me to embrace her hypothesis. Creative living is a choice, and its « Big Magic » is waiting for an open channel to use to allow genius to occur. It’s compelling to embrace her line of thinking, and suspend disbelief in the logic that can prevent my imagination from growing and inventing new ideas.

The table of contents flows well, starting with courage, moving on to enchantment, commenting on permission, recommending persistence, developing trust, and ending with divinity.

Highlights include:

« Done is better than good. » p.176

TUTSI AND HUTU

 The Tutsi are a Bantu-speaking ethnic minority from the Africa Great Lakes (Horn of Africa/Rift Valley). At the time of the Rwandan genocide, they were the minority ruling class.

When Belgian colonists (colonialists) conducted censuses in the 1920s, they defined Tutsi as anyone who owned more than 10 cows(a sign of wealth) or the physical features of a longer thin nose, high cheekbones, and over six feet tall.

The Hutu are a Bantu-speaking ethnic minority

Rwanda was ruled by Germany from 1897 to 1916, and by Belgium from 1922 to 1961.

The Hutu majority in Rwanda revolted against the Tutsi in 1962, taking power and killing up to 200, 000 Hutu. Rwanda and Burundi declared independence that same year. While many Tutsi fled, exile communities gave rise to rebel movements (Rwanda Patriotic Front was primarily in Uganda).

In 1990, with Ugandan support, and experience from the Ugandan Bush War, the RPF attacked Rwanda with the intention of taking back power, sparking a three year civil war that ended with the Arusha Accords on August 3, 1993. Intended as a negotiation to share powers between the rebels and the government, it favoured the RPF.

In 1993, Burundi’s first democratically elected president Melchior Ndadaye, a Hutu, was assassinated by Tutsi officers, sparking a genocide in which Tutsi and Hutu losses were each as many as 25,000.

In 1994, the Burundian president Cyprien Ntaryamira, a Hutu, was shot down in an airplane flying to Kigali, while the UN Security Council presence was initially 2,548 soldiers. This was a catalyst for the Rwandan civil war/ genocide, which spanned 100 days and led to over 1 million deaths, at least half of which were Tutsi. The genocide was markedly violent, with neighbours often murdered and murdering each other, and sexual violence with up to 500,000 million women raped. The war ended in the RPF defeating the government, and many Hutus involved in the massacre of Tutsi fled to Zaire (now DRC or Democratic Republic of Congo), contributing to regional instability and triggering the First Congo War in 1996.

Since the 2000 Arusha Peace Process, Burundi has a more equitable share of power betweeen the Tutsi minority and Hutu majority.

DACHA

 A dacha is a Russian country second home that’s often used in the summer. They can range in size from a small shed to a grand villa. The word means gift, originally referring to land allotted by the tsar to his nobles. In the Soviet Union, land for gardening or growing vegetables were similarly given to good workers as a reward.

RUNNING AND REPAIR

I have long been obsessed with ultra runners, having first read Born To Run and Natural Born Hero’s by Christopher McDougall, as well as Scott Jurek’s Eat and Run. I listened to a number of inspiring Ultramarathon podcasts, so riveting that I still remember where I was for some of the inspiring and sometimes crazy interview.  

Recently I have fallen into some other resources thanks to YouTube’s algorithms that have kicked me back into training videos on running, like the Running Channel and an Australian group of trainers for runners over the age of 50.

The biggest change in philosophy that I have adapted is that running needs additional strengthening to stay uninjured. What I used to do was just run, with a few sparse activities as “cross-training”. Being younger, I mostly got away with it, but I did stop running a couple of times from a self-diagnosed meniscal tear in my right knee. I stopped for a prolonged period of time after the marathon in part because I wasn’t prepared for the down side of the marathon. 

What I learned watching those videos is the concept of zone 2-3 training. The concept is basically that when you push your body to its limits, you can avoid injury if you spent a large part of your training in a low impact zone instead of pushing your limits constantly. Here is a nice summary of the concept:

The basic proportion is 2/3 1/3,  with the goal of building endurance by staying in the cardiac aerobic zone of 60-75% of maximum heart beat for 60-75% of the activity.

DROID

Growing up, Star Wars was a family favourite, especially with my two brothers owning many action figures that I still remember. 

R2D2 

ADVICE TO LOVE BY

Romance Movie on Global Freeplay

1. Signal interest - flirtation, intention

2. Connect meaningfully - life goals, dependability, humour

3. Demonstrate worth - share dreams, crack defenses, respectful

4. Establish trust - consistency, reliability, openness

First date

Movie, Coffee, Picnic

Second date

Leave comfort zone, physical activity

Third date 

Discover new things together

Fourth Date 

Show romantic side to partner

Fifth Date

Meet the family

Sixth Date