It has been a strange experience growing out hair on my legs and underarms. It still makes me a bit shy to wear a nice dress, or hang out in my bathing suit. I still look at my legs and see the shaved leg as the norm of beauty, even if I was always very forgiving of days missed.
I still feel steadfest about the need to be an example. It is literally no where else that my daughter will see an example. From deoderant commercials to the local pool, women's underarms and legs are shockingly and unnaturally devoid of hair. It's a problem for me, because it would be literally be impossible for me to be hairless. I learned this after growing a few unfortunate dark mustache and chin hairs, and trying electrolysis, which essentially pulls out the hair and injects a current that managed to give me folliculitis each time without actually preventing regrowth. In fact, the act of pulling out the hair seemed to strengthen it. I considered shaving the moustache area, but my whole face is covered in fine hair, and I couldn't see it as a believable alternative for me and my Scandinavian fuzzy face.
There have been a few unexpected things that have happened. What I have enjoyed the most is the feeling of air moving through the hair on my legs. All those years, no guy has told me of the joy of running down the street with the wind blowing through all of their hair. I always knew the feel on my head, but it never occurred to me that it could be doubled by chilling my legs on a hot summer day. I wonder what I cannot compare; what if I had never shaved, would the hair on my lower legs look like it does now, or would it be a lighter, finer version that my upper legs still sport. I am surprised that I no longer have a memory of my legs before I shaved. I am surprised at how long I have looked at my legs and without even being conscious of it, considered them ugly if they were not shaved. I am enjoying putting less garbage in a landfill since I put down my razor. I use less water in my shower. I feel like I have more time! It can't be much, but it is a tiny reduction in a burden of daily tasks.
Sometimes my daughter strokes the hair on my legs. I don't know what she thinks, but it is pretty clear that she doesn't yet think it is not a sign of normality or femininity. This makes it all worthwhile. I have also been happily suprised to see a few internet examples of women sporting underarm hair, like Julia Roberts on the red carpet, circa Notting Hill, and Sofia Lauren, in black and white. I don't know that anyone else sees me as anything but a middle age woman unkempt and unfeminine, especially in this age of waxing and laser treatments, but I am starting to feel normal seeing hair at my ankles and under my arms. No one has been outright hostile, but there have been more than a few stares. Fortunately in the era of political correctness, I am free to make this as a personal decision. I seem to be alone, but for my daughter, I will be different so that she might have a choice. How many other things have I accepted as necessary for feminine beauty without thinking? Why are you working so hard to be unnaturally beautiful? Is it for you? Why judge me for my hair that grows naturally? I find it hard to understand why hairlessness is so pervasive. You don't need to apologize to me for not shaving today. I didn't either!
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